383 lines
16 KiB
Plaintext
383 lines
16 KiB
Plaintext
SESSION #15 - MY FUNNY VALENTINE
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Written By Keiko Nobumoto
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Dialogue Translation By Bandai Entertainment, INC.
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Transcript By RFBlues
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---------------------------------------------------------------------------
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OPENING CREDITS
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Three years ago. A team of doctors in a cold blue room. Faye unconscious in
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a tank. The tank sinks into the floor and locks.
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The Bebop. Jet and Ed open up a panel in the floor to find a box of frozen
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fish.
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ED: Frozen, frozen, hard.
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Jet scans it with a sensor.
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JET: No good after all. It's full of dioxins. I had saved this as evidence
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a while back -
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Ed starts munching on them.
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JET: Don't eat it, you malnutritioned kid!
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The rotating part of the ship.
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ED: Then you want to catch a fraud? A matrimonial fraud?
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JET: Guess I have no choice.
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ED: What kinda fraud? Is it big?
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JET: Smallest of the small fry. I don't think Spike will be up for this...
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ED: Ed wants chicken kabobs!
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Ed floats away.
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JET: Guess I'll do it alone.
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The living room. Faye is asleep on the couch. She screams aloud in her
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sleep.
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FAYE: You have GOT to be kidding!
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Ein barks at her.
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FAYE: Give me a break...
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Faye suddenly smells a nasty odor.
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FAYE: This stinks!
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Ein has filled his doggy toilet.
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Faye and Ein walk to the bathroom.
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FAYE: Really. Weren't you taught that you should wipe your own butt? I've
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been thinking of who you remind me of. I know now. That guy with the
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thin eye brows... Whitney Hagas Matsumoto. I wonder why I suddenly
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was reminded of him... Do you want to know something about my past
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that nobody else knows?
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Ein yawns.
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Session #15
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MY FUNNY VALENTINE
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Three years ago. Faye is emerged from the tank.
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Faye awakens in the office of Doctor Baccus. Baccus examines Faye, while
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his secretary, Miss Manley, works at a terminal.
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BACCUS: Miss Manley, does she look resuscitated to you?
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MANLEY: Yes, she does, Doctor.
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BACCUS: Miss Manley, does she look like an old woman to you?
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MANLEY: No, she doesn't, Doctor.
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BACCUS: Do you think she has been successfully defrosted?
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MANLEY: I believe so, Doctor.
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BACCUS: Can you hear me? I am Doctor Baccus. Baccus, as in the Baccus that
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drowned more humans than Neptune. Do you know about him? But I used
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to be an alcoholic. Baccus was drowning thanks to Baccus. Hey, that
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was great! Baccus breaks into laughter.
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BACCUS: All right, open wide.
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Faye opens her mouth and he checks her.
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BACCUS: No problems. You have no wounds left, and the cells are dividing
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nicely. Now, you only have one problem to solve. Oh, it's just a
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simple process. The 30 million for the basic operation, and 54
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years' worth of interest. Hey, how much is that?
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MANLEY: 273 million. Add to that the hospital fees for a total of
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300,028,000 Woolongs.
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BACCUS: Yes, if you pay up that much, you will be free. Do you understand?
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FAYE: I don't understand...
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BACCUS: Yes, that's it - WHAT?!
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FAYE: Where is this? Who am I?
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Baccus laughs.
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BACCUS: Miss Manley?
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MANLEY: She is not acting, Doctor.
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A hospital room.
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WITNEY: I am Whitney Hagas Matsumoto, your lawyer.
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FAYE: Lawyer?
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WITNEY: At the request of the Totus Insurance Company I did some research
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on your past. Miss Faye Valentine.
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FAYE: Is that really my name?
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WITNEY: It's a lovely name. It suits you very well.
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FAYE: And?
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WITNEY: How much of your memory do you still have?
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Faye identifies various objects in the room.
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FAYE: This is a TV, this is a hot water pot and this is a cellular phone.
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I know everything except about myself.
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WITNEY: I see.
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FAYE: And?
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WITNEY: According to the materials that remain, when you were 20... Well,
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you are still 20. You seem to have been involved in a serious
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accident.
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FAYE: Accident?
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WITNEY: Such that medical technology back then could not completely cure
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you.
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FAYE: I'm totally fine, as you can see. Not a scratch on my body - Wait,
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what do you mean, "back then?"
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WITNEY: That was 54 years ago. You have been in cold-sleep, or rather
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cryogenically preserved, to this day. And you were able to reawaken
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now that you could get the treatment you needed. Just like Sleeping
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Beauty.
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FAYE: You're kidding, right?
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WITNEY: I am being serious.
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FAYE: Then this is a dream...
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WITNEY: No, it is definitely 2068 now. And this isn't a TV...
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Witney pops open the device.
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WITNEY: ...but a washing machine. And this isn't a hot water pot...
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Witney lifts the device.
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WITNEY: ...but an automatic face-washing machine.
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Witney picks up a device.
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WITNEY: And this is not a telephone, but a thermometer. You put this round
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segment in your mouth -
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FAYE: Don't mock me! You just start saying stuff like that, and you expect
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me to believe -
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Witney extends the round part of the device into Faye's mouth.
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ELECTRONIC VOICE: Body temperature: 34.5 degrees Celsius. Pulse: 54. Blood
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pressure: 40/75.
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WITNEY: Still low.
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FAYE: Wait a minute...!
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WITNEY: Your memories end back when cellular telephones still looked like
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this.
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FAYE: Then tell me! What kind of accident?! What was I like before then?!
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Who am I?!
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WITNEY: Calm down. If you get excited, you -
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FAYE: What?! What is going to happen -
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Faye faints.
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WITNEY: You'll get sleepy.
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That evening. Faye sneaks out of the hospital. She runs until she reaches
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a group of vending machines. Holograms light up selling beer and
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miscellaneous products.
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HOLOGRAM GIRL: Would you like one?
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Faye is scared off. She runs into the road and sees an approaching vehicle.
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FAYE: Hey! Hey!! HEY!!
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The vehicle zooms off a few feet above her.
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FAYE: W-Wait!
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Faye chases after it. Behind her, Witney drives up in a car.
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WITNEY: Miss Valentine!
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Faye runs off the road. Witney parks and chases after her.
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WITNEY: Wait!
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FAYE: Don't get near me!
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WITNEY: What can you do by running away?!
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Faye slips and stumbles to the ground. Witney catches up.
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WITNEY: Miss Valentine...
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FAYE: I can't pay 300 million... It's unreasonable for them to choose to
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resuscitate me and then expect me to pay the debt. I don't even know
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anything about myself... What should I do?
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Witney comforts her.
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WITNEY: We can take it slow about the debt. I will help you. Your memory
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might come back to you someday. If you keep living, you might meet
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someone wonderful.
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Witney carries Faye on his back. Faye notices a barcode tattoo on the back
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of his neck.
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FAYE: What is this?
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WITNEY: An ID. This way, if you die, or if you forget yourself they will
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know who you are and where you're from.
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FAYE: And I don't have that...
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Witney teaches Faye about the present.
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One night. A ship police intercepts Faye and Witney on the road.
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FAYE: What?!
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WITNEY: The collection agency! The insurance company got impatient!
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FAYE: What are we going to do?!
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Witney drives into the forest.
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WITNEY: At this rate, we're both doomed. You should get out of the car and
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run.
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FAYE: What about you?
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WITNEY: We'll meet up at the Doctor's place. All right?
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FAYE: Why are you helping me?
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WITNEY: The prince must protect his sleeping beauty.
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Faye gets out and Witney drives off. Faye runs and then suddenly, an
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explosion.
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Baccus' office.
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BACCUS: We just went through the paper work. He told us to hand you all of
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his assets if something happened to him... If you give us a thumb
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print here, everything he owns will be yours.
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FAYE: Whitney... You really cared for me...
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BACCUS: Now, put your thumb here.
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Baccus puts Faye's thumb on a screen. A slew of red numbers pop up.
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FAYE: Why are the numbers all red?
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BACCUS: Well, they say that debt is an asset...
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FAYE: Debt...
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Faye breaks down.
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FAYE: You have GOT to be kidding!
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She tosses a table.
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The present. The Bebop.
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FAYE: I was stupid back then, now that I think about it. I mean, he risked
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his life to save me. His debt was nothing compared to mine. It really
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wasn't that much...
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Spike walks out of the bathroom.
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FAYE: You were there the whole time?
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SPIKE: Your story was way too long.
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EYECATCH
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The Bebop living room.
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SPIKE: You are a horrible woman. I'm sure that guy is weeping in the after
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life now that you ran away without paying the debt.
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FAYE: I can't help it. It's not a sum that I can pay off.
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SPIKE: Now you're being defiant about it.
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FAYE: I've got some nerve, alright. I'm much older than you are.
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SPIKE: Your past is all lies. What was that about Romani? Did you make this
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story up too?
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FAYE: It's neither a lie, nor a fake. I just don't know the truth. Like I
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can help it.
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ED: Welcome back!
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Hammerhead returns to the Bebop.
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The living room. Jet has a handcuffed fat man.
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JET: This guy is known as the "Madam Killer." Well, he's just a cheap
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matrimonial fraud.
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SPIKE: Sure doesn't look like one.
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Faye seems to recognize him.
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JET: Well, I can do a good job even by myself. Got that?
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Faye grabs the man and spots a barcode tattoo on the back of his neck.
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FAYE: Whitney Hagas Matsumoto...
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WITNEY: H-Hey... long time no see...
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The rotating part of the ship.
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JET: What kinda relationship do they have that she wants to talk to him
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alone?
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SPIKE: Apparently it's a pretty deep relationship.
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JET: An old guy of her's?
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SPIKE: They were made for each other.
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The control room.
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FAYE: You seem very, VERY well, Mister Lawyer.
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WITNEY: Is it because I'm fat? Isn't that a biased opinion?
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FAYE: I demand an explanation.
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WITNEY: I got a fat implant after that accident. Got a little incision
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around the armpit, and had it squeezed in -
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FAYE: NOT THAT!
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WITNEY: It's been three years? You look healthy, I'm glad.
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FAYE: Yeah, I'm sure you are. Did you think that you completely reinvented
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yourself by doing that?
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WITNEY: I wanted to start over... start everything over...
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FAYE: And so you went with matrimonial fraud.
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WITNEY: To think you're a bounty hunter... This must have been destined.
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FAYE: So everyone was in on it?
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WITNEY: Back then, I couldn't do anything else. Because he sheltered me,
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the doctor... Maybe it was better to have been caught. I couldn't
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wish for anything more than having you hand me over to the police.
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The living room.
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JET: You think it's all right to leave them alone?
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SPIKE: You worried about her?
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JET: I just thought that she might let him go.
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SPIKE: Does she have that much sympathy in her heart?
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JET: Women as insistent as her tend to be the ones who get emotionally
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swayed by their exes.
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SPIKE: Is that so?
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JET: Women don't work on reason.
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Ed picks up an incoming call.
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ED: Welcome, visitors!
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A police ship floats next to the Bebop.
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VOICE: So are you the ones that reported to us?
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JET: Yeah, I want to claim a bounty.
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VOICE: I see.
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The man in the ship is Doctor Baccus. The pilot is Miss Manley.
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BACCUS: Miss Manley, prepare to rendezvous.
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MANLEY: Yes, Inspector.
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The control room.
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WITNEY: I'm glad I was able to meet you one last time. Take care...
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Faye approaches Witney and tries to unlock his handcuffs with a lock pick.
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FAYE: I won't hand you over to them!
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WITNEY: It's all right. You really don't have to mind me!
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Failing at unlocking the handcuffs, she draws her gun and shoots apart the
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chain.
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The gravity on the ship is suddenly deactivated. Spike and Jet float in the
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rotating part of the ship.
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SPIKE: Are they ready to depart already?
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JET: Is she gonna let him go?
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SPIKE: She might be letting him go.
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JET: You wanna bet?
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SPIKE: We're splitting it 60-40.
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They struggle to float to the hanger.
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JET: Dammit, hurry up, Spike!
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SPIKE: I'm trying!
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The hanger. Faye stuffs Witney into Red Tail's pod.
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WITNEY: I-It's impossible to get both of us in this!
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FAYE: I don't care. Breathe out some more! EXHALE!
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Spike and Jet enter.
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JET: Hey, wait!
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Faye points her gun at them.
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FAYE: I'm not letting you have him!
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JET: She took the guy and not the money!
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SPIKE: Jet captured him!
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FAYE: I have to repay my debt to him. So I have the right to do what I want
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with him, and the bounty on him!
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SPIKE: Amazing. She clearly states a pointless argument...
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JET: That's what I told you. Women don't work on reason.
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WITNEY: Get me off of this thing!
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JET: Are you gonna let him go?
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FAYE: We'll see!
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She shoots. Spike and Jet dodge. Jet accidentally closes the hanger doors
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for Red Tail to launch. Red Tail takes off.
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Ed and Ein floating in the living room.
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ED: Visitor, thanks for coming!
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The Red Tail in space.
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WITNEY: Where are you going? What are you going to do with me?
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FAYE: I want you to tell me the truth. Why was I there? Where does the
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truth end, and where do the lies start?
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Spike in Swordfish II chases after Faye. He shoots at Red Tail.
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FAYE: What are you doing?!
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SPIKE: If you're not careful, I'll hit the pod.
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FAYE: I'm not going to be easy on you!
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Faye shoots back.
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SPIKE: That's MY line!
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Faye fires blinders at Swordfish. Spike maneuvers around them and blow out
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Red Tail's engines.
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SPIKE: You're causing me a lot of trouble...
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FAYE: Who am I?
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WITNEY: Do you really want to know your own past? Are you prepared for the
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consequences?
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FAYE: I am!
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WITNEY: I see...
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Silence.
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FAYE: Wait a minute.
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WITNEY: Well, I don't really know myself.
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FAYE: You're so -
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BACCUS: Who you really are, where you are from, and where you will go. That
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is a question that every human asks himself at least once in his
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life.
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FAYE: And who are you?
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BACCUS: However, puberty is the only time you need to worry about things
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like that. Only bored individuals think such thoughts after a
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certain age.
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FAYE: I've heard that voice before...
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BACCUS: Can you see me?
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Baccus and Manley float by in their police ship.
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FAYE: Is that... the doctor and the nurse?
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WITNEY: Seems that way.
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FAYE: Didn't you say something like that doctor passed away?
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WITNEY: No, no... I didn't mean it THAT way...
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FAYE: YOU! How many lies do you have to tell before you're satisfied?!
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Witney cowers with fear.
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BACCUS: You were cryogenically preserved there. That we are certain of. I
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guarantee it.
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FAYE: What about my past? Who in the world am I?
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BACCUS: I gave you the name Valentine. I named you after my favorite song.
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As for everything else, all data was lost back in that Gate
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accident. So I don't know who you are, or why you were put in
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cold-sleep.
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SPIKE: He wasn't a cop?
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A fleet of police ships surround them.
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OFFICER: The patrol ship over there. State your department. I repeat. The
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patrol ship over there. State your department and registration
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number.
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MANLEY: Doctor... at this rate, we will be apprehended.
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BACCUS: It's truly unfortunate, but it's best that we not meddle in this
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any longer.
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MANLEY: Let's give up.
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BACCUS: So, farewell, Whitney. Take care of yourself.
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MANLEY: We're sorry!
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They float away.
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WITNEY: H-Hey, wait! Uncle! UNCLE!
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FAYE: Uncle?
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They take off.
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FAYE: I'll take my bounty here and now!
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SPIKE: There ya go! A jail room at a police station. Witney is behind bars.
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FAYE: Good riddance. I guess you're getting paid back for all the lies that
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you told.
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WITNEY: There is one truth that I have spoken. That I fell in love with you
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while you were asleep in love with a sleeping beauty.
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Faye stares at him. Witney blushes.
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WITNEY: No, just kidding! I'm lying! It's a lie!
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Outside the police station.
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FAYE: Did you want me to come back that badly?
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SPIKE: You sure got a big mouth.
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FAYE: You were jealous.
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SPIKE: You really are a heartless woman.
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FAYE: I guess I don't know anything about my past anymore...
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SPIKE: Isn't that something that really doesn't matter?
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FAYE: You think that way because you have a past.
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SPIKE: No matter the past, you still have a future.
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Spike flips Faye a coin.
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FAYE: What's this?
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SPIKE: Your share... of the 19,800 on his head.
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FAYE: 19,800?
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SPIKE: The smallest of the small fry.
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The Bebop.
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JET: It wasn't 198,000? I put an extra digit in there...
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The living room. Faye sleeps on the couch. Ein, with eyebrows drawn on him
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in black marker, sleeps on the floor.
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SLEEPING BEAST
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CLOSING CREDITS
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COMING EPISODE
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JET: So. The next episode of Cowboy Bebop I admit, is really heavy and
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depressing. The only people that show up are well-aged musty men. I
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hate to say this, but it is rather lackluster. Children shouldn't
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watch it. Ladies should avoid it, too. And to top it off, it's better
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for young guys to not watch either. Next episode: "Black Dog
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Serenade." Just to all the old guys - make sure you watch it.
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Next Session
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BLACK DOG SERENADE
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