diff --git a/server.py b/server.py
index 796e2a3..80036f7 100644
--- a/server.py
+++ b/server.py
@@ -7,12 +7,17 @@ import cherrypy
 import sqlite3
 import json
 
-
 dbname = "data.sqlite"
+
+# user anonymity is achieved in the laziest possible way: a literal user
+# named anonymous. may god have mercy on my soul.
 with sqlite3.connect(dbname) as _c:
-    db.anon_object = db.user_resolve(_c, "anonymous")
-    if not db.anon_object:
-        db.anon_object = db.user_register(_c, *db.anon_credentials)
+    db.anon = db.user_resolve(_c, "anonymous")
+    if not db.anon:
+        db.anon = db.user_register(
+            _c, "anonymous", # this is the hash for "anon"
+            "5430eeed859cad61d925097ec4f53246"
+            "1ccf1ab6b9802b09a313be1478a4d614")
 
 
 # creates a database connection for each thread
@@ -41,32 +46,27 @@ def api_method(function):
         try:
             # read in the body from the request to a string...
             body = str(cherrypy.request.body.read(), "utf8")
-            # is it empty? not all methods require an input
+            # is it just empty bytes? not all methods require an input
             if body:
-                # if this fucks up, we throw code 0 instead of code 1
                 body = json.loads(body)
                 if isinstance(body, dict):
                     # lowercase all of its keys
                     body = {str(key).lower(): value for key, value
                               in body.items()}
-                cherrypy.request.json = body
-
-            else:
-                cherrypy.request.json = None
+            else: # would rather a NoneType than b""
+                body = None
 
             username = cherrypy.request.headers.get("User")
             auth = cherrypy.request.headers.get("Auth")
-            anon = False
 
-            if not username and not auth:
-                user = db.anon_object
-                anon = True
-
-            elif not username or not auth:
+            if (username and not auth) or (auth and not username):
                 return json.dumps(schema.error(5,
                     "User or Auth was given without the other."))
 
-            if not anon:
+            elif not username and not auth:
+                user = db.anon
+
+            else:
                 user = db.user_resolve(cherrypy.thread_data.db, username)
                 if not user:
                     raise BBJUserError("User %s is not registered" % username)
@@ -75,24 +75,28 @@ def api_method(function):
                     return json.dumps(schema.error(5,
                         "Invalid authorization key for user."))
 
-            cherrypy.thread_data.user = user
-            cherrypy.thread_data.anon = anon
-            response = function(*args, **kwargs)
-
-        except json.JSONDecodeError as e:
-            response = schema.error(0, str(e))
+            # api_methods may choose to bind a usermap into the thread_data
+            # which will send it off with the response
+            cherrypy.thread_data.usermap = {}
+            # TODO: Why in kek's name is self needing to be supplied a value positionally?
+            value = function(None, body, cherrypy.thread_data.db, user)
+            response = schema.response(value, cherrypy.thread_data.usermap)
 
         except BBJException as e:
             response = e.schema
 
+        except json.JSONDecodeError as e:
+            response = schema.error(0, str(e))
+
         except Exception as e:
             error_id = uuid1().hex
             response = schema.error(1,
-                "Internal server error: code {}. Tell ~desvox (the code too)"
-                .format(error_id))
+                "Internal server error: code {}. {}"
+                    .format(error_id, repr(e)))
             with open("logs/exceptions/" + error_id, "a") as log:
                 traceback.print_tb(e.__traceback__, file=log)
                 log.write(repr(e))
+            print("logged code 1 exception " + error_id)
 
         finally:
             return json.dumps(response)
@@ -117,9 +121,7 @@ def create_usermap(connection, obj):
             user_id,
             externalize=True,
             return_false=False)
-        for user_id in {
-                item["author"] for item in obj
-        }
+        for user_id in {item["author"] for item in obj}
     }
 
 
@@ -154,111 +156,148 @@ APICONFIG = {
 class API(object):
     @api_method
     @cherrypy.expose
-    def get_me(self, *args, **kwargs):
+    def user_register(self, args, database, user, **kwargs):
+        """
+        Register a new user into the system and return the new object.
+        Requires the string arguments `user_name` and `auth_hash`
+        """
+        validate(args, ["user_name", "auth_hash"])
+        return db.user_register(
+            database, args["user_name"], args["auth_hash"])
+
+
+    @api_method
+    @cherrypy.expose
+    def user_update(self, args, database, user, **kwargs):
+        """
+        Receives new parameters and assigns them to the user_object
+        in the database. The following new parameters can be supplied:
+        `user_name`, `auth_hash`, `quip`, `bio`, and `color`. Any number
+        of them may be supplied.
+
+        The newly updated user object is returned on success.
+        """
+        validate(args, []) # just make sure its not empty
+        return db.user_update(database, user, args)
+
+
+    @api_method
+    @cherrypy.expose
+    def get_me(self, args, database, user, **kwargs):
         """
         Requires no arguments. Returns your internal user object,
         including your authorization hash.
         """
-        return schema.response(cherrypy.thread_data.user)
+        return user
+
 
     @api_method
     @cherrypy.expose
-    def user_get(self, *args, **kwargs):
+    def user_get(self, args, database, user, **kwargs):
         """
         Retreive an external user object for the given `user`.
         Can be a user_id or user_name.
         """
-        args = cherrypy.request.json
         validate(args, ["user"])
-        return schema.response(db.user_resolve(
-            cherrypy.thread_data.db,
-            args["user"],
-            return_false=False,
-            externalize=True))
+        return db.user_resolve(
+            database, args["user"], return_false=False, externalize=True)
 
 
     @api_method
     @cherrypy.expose
-    def thread_index(self, *args, **kwargs):
-        threads = db.thread_index(cherrypy.thread_data.db)
-        usermap = create_usermap(cherrypy.thread_data.db, threads)
-        return schema.response(threads, usermap)
+    def thread_index(self, args, database, user, **kwargs):
+        """
+        Return an array with all the threads, ordered by most recent activity.
+        Requires no arguments.
+        """
+        threads = db.thread_index(database)
+        cherrypy.thread_data.usermap = create_usermap(database, threads)
+        return threads
 
 
     @api_method
     @cherrypy.expose
-    def thread_create(self, *args, **kwargs):
-        args = cherrypy.request.json
+    def thread_create(self, args, database, user, **kwargs):
+        """
+        Creates a new thread and returns it. Requires the non-empty
+        string arguments `body` and `title`
+        """
         validate(args, ["body", "title"])
-
         thread = db.thread_create(
-            cherrypy.thread_data.db,
-            cherrypy.thread_data.user["user_id"],
-            args["body"], args["title"])
-
-        usermap = {
-            cherrypy.thread_data.user["user_id"]:
-              cherrypy.thread_data.user
-        }
-
-        return schema.response(thread, usermap)
+            database, user["user_id"], args["body"], args["title"])
+        cherrypy.thread_data.usermap = {user["user_id"]: user}
+        return thread
 
 
     @api_method
     @cherrypy.expose
-    def thread_reply(self, *args, **kwargs):
-        args = cherrypy.request.json
+    def thread_reply(self, args, database, user, **kwargs):
+        """
+        Creates a new reply for the given thread and returns it.
+        Requires the string arguments `thread_id` and `body`
+        """
         validate(args, ["thread_id", "body"])
-        return schema.response(db.thread_reply(
-            cherrypy.thread_data.db,
-            cherrypy.thread_data.user["user_id"],
-            args["thread_id"], args["body"]))
+        return db.thread_reply(
+            database, user["user_id"], args["thread_id"], args["body"])
 
 
     @api_method
     @cherrypy.expose
-    def thread_load(self, *args, **kwargs):
-        args = cherrypy.request.json
+    def thread_load(self, args, database, user, **kwargs):
+        """
+        Returns the thread object with all of its messages loaded.
+        Requires the argument `thread_id`
+        """
         validate(args, ["thread_id"])
-
-        thread = db.thread_get(
-            cherrypy.thread_data.db,
-            args["thread_id"])
-
-        usermap = create_usermap(
-            cherrypy.thread_data.db,
-            thread["messages"])
-
-        return schema.response(thread, usermap)
+        thread = db.thread_get(database, args["thread_id"])
+        cherrypy.thread_data.usermap = \
+            create_usermap(database, thread["messages"])
+        return thread
 
 
     @api_method
     @cherrypy.expose
-    def user_register(self, *args, **kwargs):
-        args = cherrypy.request.json
-        validate(args, ["user_name", "auth_hash"])
-        return schema.response(db.user_register(
-            cherrypy.thread_data.db,
-            args["user_name"],
-            args["auth_hash"]))
+    def edit_post(self, args, database, user, **kwargs):
+        """
+        Replace a post with a new body. Requires the arguments
+        `thread_id`, `post_id`, and `body`. This method verifies
+        that the user can edit a post before commiting the change,
+        otherwise an error object is returned whose description
+        should be shown to the user.
+
+        To perform sanity checks without actually attempting to
+        edit a post, use `edit_query`
+
+        Returns the new message object.
+        """
+        if user == db.anon:
+            raise BBJUserError("Anons cannot edit messages.")
+        validate(args, ["body", "thread_id", "post_id"])
+        return message_edit_commit(
+            database, user["user_id"], args["thread_id"], args["post_id"], args["body"])
 
 
     @api_method
     @cherrypy.expose
-    def edit_query(self, *args, **kwargs):
-        args = cherrypy.request.json
+    def edit_query(self, args, database, user, **kwargs):
+        """
+        Queries the database to ensure the user can edit a given
+        message. Requires the arguments `thread_id` and `post_id`
+        (does not require a new body)
+
+        Returns either boolean true or the current message object
+        """
+        if user == db.anon:
+            raise BBJUserError("Anons cannot edit messages.")
         validate(args, ["thread_id", "post_id"])
-        return schema.response(message_edit_query(
-            cherrypy.thread_data.db,
-            cherrypy.thread_data.user["user_id"],
-            args["thread_id"],
-            args["post_id"]))
+        return message_edit_query(
+            database, user["user_id"], args["thread_id"], args["post_id"])
 
 
     @cherrypy.expose
-    def test(self, *args, **kwargs):
+    def test(self, **kwargs):
         print(cherrypy.request.body.read())
-        return "{\"wow\": \"good job!\"}"
+        return "{\"wow\": \"jolly good show!\"}"
 
 
 
@@ -267,4 +306,4 @@ def run():
 
 
 if __name__ == "__main__":
-    print("wew")
+    print("yo lets do that -i shit mang")
diff --git a/src/db.py b/src/db.py
index 383a98a..76c900c 100644
--- a/src/db.py
+++ b/src/db.py
@@ -25,16 +25,7 @@ import pickle
 import json
 import os
 
-anon_object = None
-anon_credentials = \
-    ("anonymous",
-     "5430eeed859cad61d925097ec4f53246"
-     "1ccf1ab6b9802b09a313be1478a4d614")
-     # this is the hash for "anon"
-
-# if os.path.exists("cache"):
-#     os.rmdir("cache")
-# os.mkdir("cache")
+anon = None
 
 ### THREADS ###
 
@@ -267,11 +258,6 @@ def user_externalize(user_object):
     return user_object
 
 
-def user_auth(auth_hash, user_object):
-    # nominating this for most useless function in the program
-    return auth_hash == user_object["auth_hash"]
-
-
 ### SANITY CHECKS ###
 
 def contains_nonspaces(string):
@@ -358,145 +344,3 @@ def validate(keys_and_values):
                 "Color specification out of range (int 0-8)")
 
     return True
-
-
-### OLD SHIT ###
-
-# def thread_index(key="lastmod", markup=True):
-#     result = list()
-#     for ID in path.os.listdir(path.join(PATH, "threads")):
-#         thread = thread_load(ID, markup)
-#         thread.pop("replies")
-#         result.append(thread)
-#     return sorted(result, key=lambda i: i[key], reverse=True)
-#
-#
-#
-#
-# def thread_load(ID, markup=True):
-#     try:
-#         with open(path.join(PATH, "threads", ID), "r") as f:
-#             return json.loads(f.read())
-#     except FileNotFoundError:
-#         return False
-#
-#
-# def thread_dump(ID, obj):
-#     with open(path.join(PATH, "threads", ID), "w") as f:
-#         f.write(json.dumps(obj))
-#
-#
-# def thread_reply(ID, author, body):
-#     thread = thread_load(ID)
-#     if not thread:
-#         return schema.error(7, "Requested thread does not exist.")
-#
-#     thread["reply_count"] += 1
-#     thread["lastmod"] = time()
-#
-#     if thread["replies"]:
-#         lastpost = thread["replies"][-1]["post_id"]
-#     else:
-#         lastpost = 1
-#
-#     reply = schema.reply(lastpost + 1, author, body)
-#     thread["replies"].append(reply)
-#     thread_dump(ID, thread)
-#     return reply
-#
-#
-# def index_reply(reply_list, post_id):
-#     for index, reply in enumerate(reply_list):
-#         if reply["post_id"] == post_id:
-#             return index
-#     else:
-#         raise IndexError
-#
-#
-# def edit_handler(json, thread=None):
-#     try:
-#         target_id = json["post_id"]
-#         if not thread:
-#             thread = thread_load(json["thread_id"])
-#             if not thread:
-#                 return False, schema.error(7, "Requested thread does not exist.")
-#
-#
-#         if target_id == 1:
-#             target = thread
-#         else:
-#             target = thread["replies"][
-#                 index_reply(thread["replies"], target_id)]
-#
-#         if not user_is_admin(json["user"]):
-#             if json["user"] != target["author"]:
-#                 return False, schema.error(10,
-#                     "non-admin attempt to edit another user's message")
-#
-#             elif (time() - target["created"]) > 86400:
-#                 return False, schema.error(9,
-#                     "message is too old to edit (24hr limit)")
-#
-#         return True, target
-#
-#     except IndexError:
-#         return False, schema.error(3, "post_id out of bounds for requested thread")
-#
-#
-# ### USER MANAGEMENT ###
-#
-# def user_dbdump(dictionary):
-#     with open(path.join(PATH, "userdb"), "w") as f:
-#         f.write(json.dumps(dictionary))
-#
-#
-# def user_resolve(name_or_id):
-#     check = USERDB.get(name_or_id)
-#     try:
-#         if check:
-#             return name_or_id
-#         else:
-#             return USERDB["namemap"][name_or_id]
-#     except KeyError:
-#         return False
-#
-#
-# def user_register(auth_hash, name, quip, bio):
-#     if USERDB["namemap"].get(name):
-#         return schema.error(4, "Username taken.")
-#
-#     for ok, error in [
-#         user_namecheck(name),
-#         user_authcheck(auth_hash),
-#         user_quipcheck(quip),
-#         user_biocheck(bio)]:
-#
-#         if not ok:
-#             return error
-#
-#     ID = uuid1().hex
-#     scheme = schema.user_internal(ID, auth_hash, name, quip, bio, False)
-#     USERDB.update({ID: scheme})
-#     USERDB["namemap"].update({name: ID})
-#     user_dbdump(USERDB)
-#     return scheme
-#
-#
-# def user_get(ID):
-#     user = USERDB[ID]
-#     return schema.user_external(
-#         ID, user["name"], user["quip"],
-#         user["bio"], user["admin"])
-#
-#
-# def user_auth(ID, auth_hash):
-#     return auth_hash == USERDB[ID]["auth_hash"]
-#
-#
-#
-#
-# def user_update(ID, **params):
-#     USERDB[ID].update(params)
-#     return USERDB[ID]
-#
-#