diff --git a/external/cmd/signup/main.go b/external/cmd/signup/main.go
index ebc8fd8..5fdaf20 100644
--- a/external/cmd/signup/main.go
+++ b/external/cmd/signup/main.go
@@ -61,7 +61,7 @@ func (m *sceneManager) Advance() bool {
 	if m.Current.Name == "done" {
 		return false
 	}
-	if m.Current.Input.Len() == 0 {
+	if m.Current.Input.Len() == 0 && m.Current.Name != "bouncer" {
 		fmt.Fprintln(m.output, m.Current.Host.Say(m.Current.SorryMsg))
 		return false
 	}
@@ -233,8 +233,32 @@ func _main(l *log.Logger, db *sql.DB) error {
 	}
 
 	scenes := []*scene{
+		newScene("bouncer", heredoc.Doc(`
+				You enter the doorway. You can faintly hear hearty chatter on the
+				other side of the door ahead. A bell rings above your head and alerts
+				an older gentleman behind the plastic window to your presence.
+
+				The man slides the divider open to greet you.
+
+				[-:-:b]the bouncer says:[-:-:-]
+					hey there. we're going to ask you a few questions throughout this,
+					to see what you're about. first, though, i gotta confirm that you
+					are [-:-:b]at least sixteen years of age[-:-:b].
+
+					if you are under 16, you can type [-:-:b]/quit[-:-:-] and press enter.
+					feel free to come back when you're a little older.
+
+					otherwise, just type [-:-:b]/nod[-:-:-] and i'll be out of your way.
+			`),
+			"",
+			newCharacter("the bouncer", "a charming and friendly lad"),
+			func(s *scene) {},
+			func(s *scene, tv *tview.TextView, _ string) {
+				fmt.Fprintln(tv, s.Host.Say("i gotta make sure you're over 16. rules are rules."))
+			},
+		),
 		newScene("start", heredoc.Doc(`
-				You open your eyes.
+				Everything goes quiet. You open your eyes.
 
 				You're in some kind of workshop. 
 				Wires and computers in various state of disrepair are strewn across
@@ -245,13 +269,13 @@ func _main(l *log.Logger, db *sql.DB) error {
 
 				[-:-:b]wire guy says:[-:-:-]
 					hello, welcome to the application for membership in tilde town.
-					first, please let me know what a good [-:-:b]email address[-:-:-] is for you?
+					first, please let me know what your [-:-:b]email address[-:-:-] is?
 
 					just say it out loud. as many times as you need. to get it right.
 
 					once you've told me your email you can [-:-:b]/nod[-:-:-] to move on.
 			`),
-			"i'm sorry, before going further could you share an email with me?",
+			"i'm sorry, before going further could you share your email with me?",
 			newCharacter("wire guy", "a lil homonculus made of discarded computer cables"),
 			func(s *scene) {
 				su.Email = string(s.Input.Bytes())