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<header id="title-block-header">
<h1 class="title">BASEMENT QUEST</h1>
</header>
<nav id="TOC" role="doc-toc">
<ul>
<li><a href="#about" id="toc-about">About</a></li>
<li><a href="#characters" id="toc-characters">Characters</a>
<ul>
<li><a href="#corraidhín" id="toc-corraidhín">Corraidhín</a></li>
<li><a href="#glarg" id="toc-glarg">Glarg</a></li>
<li><a href="#inky" id="toc-inky">Inky</a></li>
<li><a href="#jarrod" id="toc-jarrod">Jarrod</a></li>
<li><a href="#sneaky-willows" id="toc-sneaky-willows">Sneaky
Willows</a></li>
<li><a href="#tea-filler" id="toc-tea-filler">Tea Filler</a></li>
</ul></li>
<li><a href="#meta" id="toc-meta">Meta</a>
<ul>
<li><a href="#policies" id="toc-policies">Policies</a></li>
<li><a href="#mechanics" id="toc-mechanics">Mechanics</a></li>
</ul></li>
<li><a href="#epistolary" id="toc-epistolary">Epistolary</a>
<ul>
<li><a href="#section" id="toc-section">00001</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-1" id="toc-section-1">00002</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-2" id="toc-section-2">00003</a></li>
<li><a href="#meta-1" id="toc-meta-1">META</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-3" id="toc-section-3">00004</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-4" id="toc-section-4">00005</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-5" id="toc-section-5">00006</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-6" id="toc-section-6">00007</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-7" id="toc-section-7">00008</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-8" id="toc-section-8">00009</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-9" id="toc-section-9">00010</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-10" id="toc-section-10">00011</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-11" id="toc-section-11">00012</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-12" id="toc-section-12">00013</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-13" id="toc-section-13">00014</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-14" id="toc-section-14">00015</a></li>
<li><a href="#section-15" id="toc-section-15">00016</a></li>
</ul></li>
<li><a href="#bestiary" id="toc-bestiary">Bestiary</a></li>
<li><a href="#geography" id="toc-geography">Geography</a></li>
<li><a href="#cosmology" id="toc-cosmology">Cosmology</a></li>
<li><a href="#history" id="toc-history">History</a></li>
<li><a href="#spoilers" id="toc-spoilers">Spoilers</a>
<ul>
<li><a href="#names" id="toc-names">names</a></li>
<li><a href="#crystals" id="toc-crystals">crystals</a></li>
<li><a href="#hodgepodge" id="toc-hodgepodge">hodgepodge</a></li>
</ul></li>
</ul>
</nav>
<h2 id="about">About</h2>
<p>This is a game that me and the kids in the basement are playing over
email.</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-07/msg00004.html">www
thread</a></p>
<p>Youll probably be most interested in <a href="#epistolary">jumping
straight to the story</a></p>
<p>If youre not on the mailing list and want to keep up with the story,
you can <a href="https://tilde.town/~dozens/quest/rss.xml">subscribe to
the rss feed</a>.</p>
<h2 id="characters">Characters</h2>
<h3 id="corraidhín">Corraidhín</h3>
<details>
<summary>
<p>Bio</p>
</summary>
<p>They call me Corraidhín, and while my wisened age may seem an
impediment to our expedition I assure you I make up for it with my sharp
wit and intellect! By trade I am a scholar, master of the histories of
this realm, and a dabbler in the arcane and mystic arts.</p>
<p>I believe my skills naturally lend themselves to this expedition. Im
certain youll need someone to elucidate upon the history of these
artifacts, and should trouble come our way Im ready at hand with spells
a plenty. Im not the best with a sword, but can hold my own with a bow
staff, but it may be best to leave the fighting up to you younguns. If
we encounter arcane ruins or cryptic texts youll find my skills just as
useful as the finest blade in battle.</p>
<p>I think with my share of the reward Ill buy more books. Lots and
lots of books, a whole library of books! And then Ill start a library,
yes that sounds delightful. And maybe one of those books will have some
information on ridding me of that accursed demon, but thats another
story entirely.</p>
</details>
<ul>
<li>Player: sinatra</li>
<li>XP: 0</li>
<li>Skills: Do Anything 1, Arcane Lore 2, Sneak 2</li>
</ul>
<h3 id="glarg">Glarg</h3>
<details>
<summary>
<p>Bio</p>
</summary>
<p>I am Glarg, an earth elemental who was conjured by a wizard who was
immediately beheaded after summoning me. By some freak accident I was
not sent back home to the earth elemental plane when the spell should
have ended. While I have learned the common tonge in my time on this
plane, I have not developed the ability to speak it, because I have no
mouth. Im a very gentle soul who is misunderstood because of my hard,
cold exterior.</p>
<p>Im pretty durable and good with rocks.</p>
<p>With my share of the money, I plan to hire a mage to send me home, or
turn everyone else into earth elementals.</p>
</details>
<ul>
<li>Player: kindrobot</li>
<li>XP: 0</li>
<li>Skills: Do Anything 1</li>
</ul>
<h3 id="inky">Inky</h3>
<details>
<summary>
<p>Bio</p>
</summary>
<p>Inkulos Iridis greets you merrily! Some call me Inky the Tiny because
of my slight size (perfectly average for imps, I assure you!) and a
fondness for ink.</p>
<p>I may be small and nowhere as battle-hardened as knights in shining
armour, but I can skip out of a monsters grasp before you can say
“scram!”, slip through the cracks (often unseen), scout for useful
items, and brew all kinds of ink with special effects for discerning
drinkers.</p>
<p>What do you plan to do with your cut of the money? Buy lots of ink
ingredients, of course! With the money, the very first ink patio with
the best paper nibbles will be opening to serve all from far and wide
very soon!</p>
</details>
<ul>
<li>Player: mio</li>
<li>XP: 0</li>
<li>Skills: Do Anything 1, Persuasive 2</li>
</ul>
<h3 id="jarrod">Jarrod</h3>
<details>
<summary>
<p>Bio</p>
</summary>
<p>A broad-chested, olive skinned human finishes a pint of ale with a
long swig. He greets the group with a merry-looking smile, though it
doesnt seem to touch his eyes. He seems a touch distracted, as if
something else is on his mind. A feeling of lingering sadness touches
his aura.</p>
<p>“Greetings, my friends! My name is Jarrod. And this here …” he taps a
heavy warhammer leaning against the back of his chair “… is Gertrude.
When it comes to danger, consider us your shield. I will blunt what
dangers may come from ahead and protect those who shelter behind. Im
more than good in a fight, specializing in up-close battles and …” he
gives a small smirk “… alternative forms of negotiations.”</p>
<p>He leans over and places his elbows on the table, tenting his fingers
and leaning in with his chin touching them as he continues. A thin
leather cord adorned with small charms carved from bone is draped around
his left wrist.</p>
<p>“Other than that, Im willing to take on cooking chores and spin the
occasional tale around a campfire. My cut of the money goes towards
opening my own tavern when I retire.”</p>
</details>
<ul>
<li>Player: marc</li>
<li>XP: 0</li>
<li>Skills: Do Anything 1, Oratory 2</li>
</ul>
<h3 id="sneaky-willows">Sneaky Willows</h3>
<details>
<summary>
<p>Bio</p>
</summary>
<p>Im “Sneaky” Willows (nobody knows my actual name), an elvish
pickpocket with a love for sneakin, stabbin and music playin! Some
people say Im no good at music playin, but then I go sneakin and
stabbin em!</p>
<p>On this team I think Im gonna be good at sneakin up to those
crystals and grabbin em right from under the guards noses!</p>
<p>With my money Im plannin to hire a bard to teach me more music, so
I can really impress people with my playin and maybe not even have to
stab them!</p>
</details>
<ul>
<li>Player: nico</li>
<li>XP: 0</li>
<li>Skills: Do Anything 1</li>
</ul>
<h3 id="tea-filler">Tea Filler</h3>
<details>
<summary>
<p>Bio</p>
</summary>
<p>Who: Teefoon Filler of the Bucket, Knight of the 3rd order of
Balmarlovemeer, Crester of the Golden-Fringed Ridge and 2nd to the
Keeper of the Grimoire Glorious. You may call me “Tea.” (Tea is,
notably, a giant. ~11ft tall).</p>
<p>What: Retired Cleric turned Archeologist.</p>
<p>Cash: A sturdy wagon and 5 head of oxen to pull it. I wish to travel
further than my legs can take me.</p>
</details>
<ul>
<li>Player: eli</li>
<li>XP: 0</li>
<li>Skills: Do Anything 1</li>
</ul>
<h2 id="meta">Meta</h2>
<p>Welcome to Basement Quest!</p>
<p>Were gonna play this by ear, and cross each bridge only when we get
to it.</p>
<h3 id="policies">Policies</h3>
<ul>
<li><p>Safety: Practice safe roleplaying.</p></li>
<li><p>Cadence: Ill move the story along roughly once a week. Hopefully
that gives everybody time to post something and participate.</p></li>
<li><p>Inclusion over realism: If you disappear for a while and then
come back, your character will immediately reappear as though theyve
been there the whole time. Come and go as you please. Open door
policy!</p></li>
<li><p>Linearity: Respond only to the most recent email in the thread.
(We might play around with time later, but for now, lets keep it
simple.)</p></li>
</ul>
<h3 id="mechanics">Mechanics</h3>
<p>Shoes in the Dark:</p>
<p><a href="https://dozens.itch.io/shoes-in-the-dark"
class="uri">https://dozens.itch.io/shoes-in-the-dark</a></p>
<p>To do something, say that you do it, and then it probably
happens!</p>
<p>If there is a risk, or chance of failure, well roll dice to
determine the outcome. Well use a variation of “Roll for Shoes” because
its probably the most simple system there is. Everybody will start out
pretty even skills wise. But you will eventually get really good at
really specific things.</p>
<p>Everybody starts with one skill: <em>Do anything 1</em></p>
<p>So to attempt to <em>do anything</em>, roll 1d6.</p>
<ul>
<li>1 - 3: Things go poorly. Gain 1 xp.</li>
<li>4 - 5: Partial success / success at cost</li>
<li>6: Great success!</li>
</ul>
<p>If you roll all sixes, you gain a new +1 skill which must be a subset
of the skill you just used.</p>
<p>Example:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Player: I kick down the door. Ill roll Do Anything (1) aaaand,
thats a six!”</p>
<p>Referee: You now have “Kicking Down Doors 2”</p>
<p>Later….</p>
<p>Player: I bust down the door with a flying kick! Ill roll Kicking
Down Doors 2 aaaand, two sixes!</p>
<p>Referee: You now have “Doorbane 3”</p>
<p>Player: Siiiick, doors fear me.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Every time you fail a roll, you gain 1 xp.</p>
<p>You can spend xp to turn any die into a six for the purpose of
advancement.</p>
<h2 id="epistolary">Epistolary</h2>
<p>These are all the letters I send to the email list.</p>
<p>You can subscribe to these updates with the rss feed.</p>
<p><a href="https://tilde.town/~dozens/quest/rss.xml"
class="uri">https://tilde.town/~dozens/quest/rss.xml</a></p>
<h3 id="section">00001</h3>
<p>“Congratulations!” The slightly tipsy hobbit grins and salutes you
with his martini. “On Retrieval Team 43s inaugural mission! Im so
excited for you, Im sure youll do fantastic!”</p>
<p>You are all seated around a table in the corner at Lucys Basement.
It is dimly lit and fairly noisy. The walls are covered in red velvet
curtains, and the tablecloths have little gold tassels. A cloud of
purple smoke from candles, cigars, and pipes hangs in the air. Waiters
bustle between tables refilling drinks.</p>
<p>“So to recap, the Benefactor has tasked you with retrieving the five
fabled Ginnarak Crystals. I, Blavin Blandfoot, will be your case
manager. You will be paid handsomely for each crystal you retrieve. And
if you retrieve all 5, youll get to meet the Benefactor at be their
guest at their <em>glorious mansion!</em></p>
<p>“The first crystal has been spotted near a Gnomish dig site in the
Tammineaux Forest, just east of here.”</p>
<p>“I recommend getting started right away!” He polishes off his drink
and squints at his empty glass. “Well, maybe first thing in the morning.
Waiter!”</p>
<ul>
<li>Who are you?</li>
<li>What role do you think you will fill on the team?</li>
<li>What do you plan to do with your cut of the money?</li>
</ul>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-07/msg00015.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-1">00002</h3>
<p>Blavin provides you with a multibeast for your excursion. “Courtesy
of the Benefactor!” You pack it up with food and supplies, and trek into
the Tammineaux Forest in search of the first Ginnarak Crystal.</p>
<p>The forest is lush, thick, and green. You have to hack your way
through the vines and the brush. There are stinging insects, squawking
birds, and dangerous forest creatures a plenty. It is hot and
sticky.</p>
<p>How will you ever find your way through this wilderness to the dig
site?</p>
<p>“Shouldnt be too hard,” you remember Blavin saying back at Lucys,
gesturing carelessly and sloshing a little bit of his fourth drink.
“Theyre gnomes, after all! Just follow the sound of explosions and
screaming.”</p>
<p>Sure enough, before long you hear a mechanical droning and some
blasting up ahead, punctuated now and then by high pitched screams, and
you guide the multibeast in that direction.</p>
<p>Suddenly you are ambushed by a troop of blahoblins! Awful looking
things. Taut rubbery gray skin. Long flat noses stick out way far from
their faces. And so do their protruding, lipless mouths full of sharp
pointy teeth. You didnt hear them over the noise of the shrieking
parrots and, in the distance, the shrieking gnomes.</p>
<p>“SHOE SHINE!!” the first one yells. It is wearing a gold ring on each
finger (minus the three fingers it is missing), two in each ear, and one
in its nose. It is dragging a vat of black polish nearly as tall as it
is.</p>
<p>“SHOE SHINE!!” a second one agrees. It is wearing a nice waistcoat
with large gaudy buttons, and a nice looking pocket watch on a gold
chain. It is dragging a comfy looking chair stuffed with bits of fluff
and leaves and fur.</p>
<p>A third one screams, “SHOE SHINE SHOE SHINE!” It has several gold
teeth and carries a huge block of cheese secured to its back with long
loops of hempen rope.</p>
<p>The fourth and final one is wearing what looks like freshly painted
red shoes and is carrying a lit torch. “SHOE SHIIIIINE!” it screams. It
is wearing a gold medallion on a gold necklace.</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-07/msg00015.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-2">00003</h3>
<blockquote>
<p>“SHOE SHINE!” Bellows Tea, with a full bodied laugh!</p>
<p>With a well practiced move, faster than one would think giant like
Tea could move, Tea removes an object from their satchel.</p>
<p>…at first glance it appears to be a flail without a handle, but is
actually a spare pair of giant boots, held by their laces.</p>
<p>“These could indeed use a good shining.”</p>
<p>The boot are spectacularly large, probably a 1/2 size too large, in
all honest, for even Teas feet.</p>
<p>The boots have gold eyelets.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Earrings greedily snatches the boots and start washing, drying, and
polishing them to a shine. Waistcoat eagerly tugs on Teas wrist and
guides him to the comfy chair, which is decidedly too small for his
bulky frame. Teeth graciously offers him a wedge of cheese.</p>
<p>Depending on how observant Tea is, he may or may not notice that the
boots are returned to him with 1 - 3 fewer eyelets.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Bending down, Inky sniffs the bottles carefully, mumbling, “Creosote,
shellac, hopweed … ou, wild cherry liquorice.” Then, a little louder to
one of the blahoblins, though it came out not much more than a squeak,
“Might I ask from where did you get these?”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>“Shoe Polish! We Make! Roots and ash!” shouts Waistcoat. They seem to
only have the one volume.</p>
<p>“Beeswax!” yells Earrings.</p>
<p>“Resin!” cries Teeth.</p>
<p>“SHOE SHIIINE!” they all cry in unison.</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-07/msg00022.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="meta-1">META</h3>
<p>This might be a good time to introduce the game mechanic.</p>
<p>For the most part, if you say you do something, it just happens.</p>
<p>But if you want to do something risky, and/or if the outcome is
uncertain, you can roll a number of six-sided dice.</p>
<p>Id like to try using the <em>Shoes in the Dark</em> rules:</p>
<p>https://dozens.itch.io/shoes-in-the-dark</p>
<p>Basically, everybody currently has the skill “Do Anything 1”, which
means if you want to do anything, you can roll 1 die.</p>
<p>On a 1 - 3, things go poorly. (And you gain 1 experience point. More
on that in a bit.)</p>
<p>On a 4 - 5, you do the thing, but at a cost, or with a complication,
or its just a partial success.</p>
<p>On a 6, full success!! Yay, you!!</p>
<p>(When rolling multiple dice, you read the single highest roll.)</p>
<p>Heres where stuff gets fun. If you roll all sixes (so, 1 six on a
1d6 roll, 2 sixes on a 2d6 roll, etc.) then you level up and get a new
skill. The new skill A) is a subset of the skill/action you just
performed and, B) increases that skill by one.</p>
<p>e.g. I challenge a mugwump to a pie eating contest and roll Do
Anything 1. I roll a six, so I win the contest! And also I gain a new
skill, Belly Of Steel 2.</p>
<p>Finally, every time you fail a roll (by rolling 1 - 3) you gain 1
experience point. You can spend 1 experience at any time to turn any one
die into a six <em>for the purposes of advancement</em>.</p>
<p>SO WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN???</p>
<p>When you interact with the blahoblins, consider whether there is an
element of risk. If so, roll the appropriate amount of dice (1, in this
case) and include the result in your description. If its a success,
describe the success. If its a partial success or a failure, just
describe what you do, and Ill describe the complication, or how things
get worse.</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-07/msg00023.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-3">00004</h3>
<blockquote>
<p>“And jolly good polish too, it looks like,” Inky replies, squinting a
bit at the ichor being smeared onto the boots in Earrings large
calloused hands. “I hear there be some gnomes hereabouts? A camp? With
your remarkable service, I bet theyd be coming to you all the time to
get their boots cleaned.”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>“GNOMES!?” Earrings interrobangs loudly and questioningly. It brings
its hands to the sides of its face, covering its ear holes, and wags its
oversized head in dismay, squeezing its tiny eyes shut. In the process,
it smears polish around its face.</p>
<p>“Gnomes there!” shouts Waistcoat. Its hands busy polishing, it tosses
its head, gesturing with its prodigious proboscis in the direction you
were heading. You continue to hear bangs and booms in the distance every
once a while.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Glarg gurgles something to the effect of “gluggurguuuurglaaaachhhh?”
Its stance is one of surprise as its disposition changes to that of
inquisition as its head cranes down to look at the blahoblin carrying
the smelly rock on its back.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Teeth looks questioningly up at Glarg and experimentally gargles back
up at it. “GURGLE BURBLE GLUG GLUG?” It smiles apologetically (a
fearsome sight, its protruding jaws full of tiny pointy teeth) and
shrugs and asks, “Shoe shine?”</p>
<blockquote>
<p>It attempts to pick that whole blahoblin up and bring the smelly rock
to its face for a closer inspection.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>“WAAAAAAH!” Teeth kicks its feet ineffectively and is quite
helplessly tied to the big smelly rock when Glarg picks it up. The
smelly rock smells pungent, sharp, earthy, moldy. Definitely could be
food.</p>
<p>By this time the blahoblins have polished the shoes of everybody who
has consented to it, and are packing up. Except for Teeth who is being
detained by the earth elemental.</p>
<p>Red Shoes reappears from wherever they have been this whole time with
a sly smile and rejoins its comrades.</p>
<p>Your pockets have successfully been picked while you were distracted
with the shoe shine, but not of anything of particular value.</p>
<p>What small item(s) will you notice is missing in the hours and days
to come? How will its absence be a minor inconvenience?</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-07/msg00031.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-4">00005</h3>
<blockquote>
<p>As the blahoblins were packing up, Inky persuades Waistcoat to sell a
few small bottles of shoe polish, a roughly round piece of broken glass
and scraps of cheesecloth from the mountain of debris previously on the
ground. Inky rolls Do Anything 1 and rolls a 4.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Inky successfully persuades Waistcoat to sell a few baubles and
trinkets with the first roll of the game!</p>
<p>They haggle back and forth a little bit, and Inky ends up paying a
little more than they wanted to, but they get all the stuff they wanted.
Yay commerce!</p>
<p>Having concluded business, the blahoblins pack up and disappear into
the bushes toting their chair, cheese, and vat of polish.</p>
<p>The sound of mechanical droning and periodic explosions compel you
forward to the dig site.</p>
<p>It is easy to find.</p>
<p>It is a large hole blasted deep into the ground. There are drills,
and conveyor belts, earth moving machines, and all kinds of gadgets and
gizmos, the purpose of which is not always readily apparent. And there
is a zip line that seems to be the only way down to the bottom.</p>
<p>The site is absolutely teeming with gnomes. Diminutive humanoids with
bright red noses and long, long ears, and long, nimble fingers. All
gnomes are compulsive tinkerers and mechanics, and build fantastic
contraptions. All gnomes are women, and are all highly explosive. Which
makes their combustion powered machines extremely dangerous, both for
themselves and for any unfortunate bystanders close enough to get caught
in the blast.</p>
<p>A gnome in a white hat comes running up to you. “You there! Hey! Yes,
you!”</p>
<p>“Are you the retrieval team? Weve been expecting you! The whole dig
is halted because we accidentally blasted into a whole nest of Kobits,
and they wont let us get near to keep digging! They keep sabotaging our
machines when we try!”</p>
<p>“They also stole the Ginnarak Crystal that we found! That thing could
have powered such glorious new machines!” She pouts.</p>
<p>In the background, a gnome who had crawled half way into a coal bin
in the side of some kind of excavator suddenly scrambles quickly out,
smoking, and runs around in circles in a panic. Nearby gnomes dive out
of the way as she erupts in a small ball of fire. The gnomes wait for
the smoke to clear and then immediately return to working on the
contraption.</p>
<p>The foreman continues talking to you as though nothing happened. She
leads you over to the edge of the hole and points to the bottom.</p>
<p>“The entrance to their cave is right down there! The zip line is the
second fastest way down.”</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DO</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-07/msg00035.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-5">00006</h3>
<p>Suddenly three anthropomorphic gophers come crashing through the
trees behind you into the dig site. The first is wearing a sash of many
pockets. The second is wearing cargo shorts of many pockets. The third
is wearing a vest of many pockets. Each wears a pair of goggles with
thick smokey black lenses, and a floppy checkered hat that looks like a
waffle.</p>
<p>They march up to the zip-line.</p>
<p>“Out of the way, losers!” Sash cries. It grabs the zip-line trolley,
and immediately dives off the side of the cliff and zooms down into the
deep, deep hole.</p>
<p>Vest introduces itself, “Retrieval Team 70 here! We are here to
recover the Ginnarak Crystal that is reported to be at this location.
After we collect all five, then it will be <em>us</em> who get to hang
out in the Benefactors hot tub! Not you! Ha!”</p>
<p>Sash has reached the bottom of the deep, deep hole. Shorts starts
reeling in the pulley.</p>
<p>Vest leans in close and peers at you through its foggy lenses. “You
must be the new Retrieval Team 43. Hmmph. Shame what happened to the
previous Team 43. Hope you know what youre doing! Would hate to see you
end up like them!”</p>
<p>Shorts grabs the trolley and leaps down into the deep, deep hole. It
sails all the way down, and joins Sash at the bottom.</p>
<p>“Welp!” Vest concludes with an air of finality. “No hard feelings,
and all that! After we collect this crystal, we just need four more. And
then we get to meet the Benefactor! Ha!”</p>
<p>It waddles off and starts reeling in the trolley.</p>
<p>Meanwhile, another gnome explodes behind you.</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DO</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-07/msg00036.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-6">00007</h3>
<blockquote>
<p>Inky peers down at the hole, and after some time, turns to the party.
“Do you think theyve cleared most of the gnomes by now, or should we
wait until they emerge and grab the crystal then?” Gazing at some
invisible spot farther among the trees, Inky continued, “One of the old
miners back at the tavern said there used to be a natural maw on the
southwestern side, but it was blocked when the tunnel caved in many
years ago. The gnomes dont waste their efforts on blowing up things
knowing someones already been through them. Chances are theres only
one exit, unless this mine is a decoy.”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Inky peers down the hole and watches Retrieval Team 70 approach the
kobit caves.</p>
<p>The maw on the southwestern side did indeed collapse several seasons
ago. If you know anything about the industrial and intrepid kobits
however, it is that they have probably dug several alternative, secret
entrances since then.</p>
<p>Just as the gophers reach the cave entrance, a large erge, muscles
rippling beneath its white feathers, emerges from behind a boulder and
blocks their way forward.</p>
<p>It raises the feathery crest on the crown of its head, and fluffs up
its plumage in a dramatic display. It appears to be arguing with the
gophers. All three gophers appear to be arguing back.</p>
<p>The egre gestures angrily at the gophers feet, shakes its head, and
crosses its arms defiantly. The gophers look down at their own feet and
shuffle about as though embarrassed.</p>
<p>They all exchange a few more words and then the gophers retreat away
from the egre and the cave entrance. They huddle together briefly and
then start slowly climbing the scaffolding back up to the top of the
hole.</p>
<p>“Oh yeah,” the foreman remarks absentmindedly. “Theres an egre
guarding the kobit caves.”</p>
<p>The egre below preens and struts about proudly having chased off the
gophers.</p>
<p>“Stubborn things,” the foreman continues. “Easily provoked to
violence. Impeccable fashion sense though.”</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DO</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-08/msg00003.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-7">00008</h3>
<blockquote>
<p>Inky blinks down at their pinecrab apple leather boots consideringly.
“Teas got the fanciest footgear, but at least we arent sporting fetid
foot fungi like stockings. Maybe we could persuade the egre to let us
through? It might set us back half a day trying to find any kobit holes
that arent just non-portable potties.”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>You look down at your boots. How serendipitous that you just had them
shined by the blahoblins! You feel confident in your footwear.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Corraidhín: I may have a solution to the Egre problem. I gesture
grandly, as it so happens I always come prepared for a fashion show.</p>
<p>With a grand gesture I cast a spell to transform my robes into a
stunning suit, complete with top hat, monocle, and cane</p>
<p>Im certain we can convince the fine fellow to let us pass if we look
the part. Or better yet, Im almost certain I can distract him while the
rest of you sneak past, Ive been told I can be quite verbose and
boisterous.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Corraidhín successfully conjures up a stunning suit, surely the envy
of every dandy, fop, and gentleman in the southern continent, if not all
of Basmentaria!</p>
<p>A nearby gnome gets flush, starts to fan herself excitedly, and then
explodes dramatically.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>“A splendid idea, with an equally splendid outfit to match!” Inky
exclaimed. “Then, shall we proceed? Master Corraidhín, at your
signal.”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>You proceed down into the gnome hole.</p>
<p>Retrieval Team 70 glares at you from behind their smoked glass
goggles as you zip line past them. They continue their slow, defeated
climb up the scaffolding. Vest shakes its gopher fist at you and swears,
“You havent seen the last of us, Retrieval Team 43!”</p>
<p>At the bottom, on solid ground, you approach the entrance to the
kobit caves.</p>
<p>Standing guard at the entrance to the kobit tunnels is a massive
egre, a fearsome bird beast, muscles rippling and bulging beneath its
beautiful white plumage. It turns its head and regards you with one jet
black eye and then the other, snapping its sharp beak in the air as it
tosses its head back and forth.</p>
<p>It looks you up and down, and its gaze rests on your freshly polished
shoes. It huffs and grunts, “Your shoes look clean.” It rests its
scrutinizing gaze on Corraidhíns garments. “And YOU look FABULOUS!” it
exclaims as it tosses its head and beats it wings excitedly.</p>
<p>“You may enter.” It graciously steps aside with a flourish.</p>
<p>The smallest of you can stand upright in the kobit tunnels. The
largest of you have to crawl.</p>
<p>Kobits are small, vaguely mammalian, vaguely reptilian bipedal cave
creatures. They are scaly and furry, and live in tunnels deep in the
earth. They have huge yellow eyes, and long fine whiskers on their
snouts and faces, all of which help them find their way around in the
dark. They also have long, thick, coarse, drooping mustaches. The
overall effect is that they look like tiny, monstrous, perpetually
startled cowboys.</p>
<p>You follow the winding tunnel down into the earth.</p>
<p>You come around a corner and almost bump right into a kobit. It has
eyes like saucers and an awe-inspiring mustache. It wears a name tag
(“Corey”) and carries a clipboard. It blinks at you in surprise and then
asks, “Who are you? What are you doing in here?” Corey flips through the
pages on its clipboard. “There are no upsiders scheduled to arrive
today. I dont think youre supposed to be here!” Corey glances around
nervously with its huge eyes and looks about ready to cry out for
help.</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DO?</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-08/msg00012.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-8">00009</h3>
<blockquote>
<p>Inky smiles at Corey. “Hullo! Were the waterworks crew from the
neaby town, here to check the outhouse tunnels, inspect all the pipes
and so on. We received reports of a blockage somewhere inside the
networks. Have the tunnels been flushing well lately?” While speaking,
Inky flashes a waterworkers ID briefly at the kobit before pocketing it
and pulling out a pressure gauge, giving the little handle on one side
of the device a few cranks, and looking back at Corey expectantly.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Corey slowly blinks its eyes. “Inspektor?”</p>
<p>ASIDE: I rolled for Inky and rolled a six, which according to the
rules means GREAT SUCCESS, and also Inky gets to Level Up: they gain the
skill Persuasive 2.</p>
<p>“Of course! Inspektors! Yes, yes, right this way! A surprise
inspection, how exciting!”</p>
<p>Corey continues to chatter excitedly as it leads you further into the
branching, winding tunnels, pointing out particular bits of stonework
and engineering, and also baubles and trinkets and fossils and artifacts
that the kobits uncovered in the process of digging their tunnels.</p>
<p>Your tour eventually brings you into a large cavern with tunnels
exactly like the one from which you just entered branching off in all
directions. It makes you dizzy to think of finding your way through this
labyrinth without a guide.</p>
<p>In the middle of the cavern is a deep pool with a fountain. At the
bottom of the pool, a SWORD is thrust into the ground almost up to its
hilt. A large jewel set deep in the pommel rolls around like an eye in a
socket and tracks your movement around cavern. A few bubbles float up to
the surface of the pool.</p>
<p>And set into the wall on the far side of the room is a massive stone
door reinforced with thick iron bands. There is a keypad and a small
printer on the wall next to it.</p>
<p>“….and so our tour concludes here in the central atrium!” Corey
concludes excitedly. “Behind this door is the VAULT, where we keep all
the valuables. Gemstones, gold, crystals, et cetera.”</p>
<p>“Top notch security!” Corey exclaims tapping the keypad. The printer
spits out a square of paper. It reads</p>
<pre><code>ed v1.16
*
?
*
?
*e door
19
*,n
1 the door is Locked
*wq</code></pre>
<p>“Ha ha!” Corey shakes its head in amazement. “I have no idea how this
thing works!”</p>
<p>The eye in the sword watches as Corey clips the small printout to its
clipboard.</p>
<p>“Now, I trust youll find that everything was in tip-top order! Yes,
indeed!” Corey wriggles its mustache proudly. “Now if youll excuse me,”
it flips through the pages on its clipboard, “I am late for my next
appointment. Good day!” Corey turns and walks toward one of the twisty
little passageways, all alike.</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DO?</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-08/msg00016.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-9">00010</h3>
<p>Once Corey the Kobit exits the antechamber, you are free to look
around a little bit.</p>
<p>The eyesword continues to watch from the bottom of the pool, and the
Kobit Ed terminal continues to await you by the vault door.</p>
<p>But also you notice a couple of alcoves along the walls between the
twisty little passages. Each of them holds a relief sculpture depicting
one of the three deities of Basmentaria.</p>
<p>There is Neddas, the wise god of sages and starlight. Androgynous,
clad in purple robes, depicted with a golden third eye in the middle of
their forehead. They are shown here stoically bestowing gifts upon the
inhabitants of Basmentaria.</p>
<p>And here is Nullar, god of time and tides. A bespectacled male figure
with a golden third eye on his forehead. He is dressed in a dapper vest
and bow tie, and is adorned with small cogs and gears. He is depicted
here looking up at the stars from a mechanical contraption he is working
on.</p>
<p>Finally, there is Liandt, goddess of war and flame. A primal,
elemental deity, she is depicted as a fiery warrior with a golden third
eye. The relief shows her on the battlefield during the Artifice wars.
The wars which reduced Ginnarak to the wastes of cinder and ash that
they are today. The wars which drained Liandts divine energies so
thoroughly that she fell into a deep sleep and has been absent from the
mortal realms ever since.</p>
<p>But enough of this lore dump! There is something important
happening!</p>
<p>You hear a shuffling and a mumbling approaching from one of the
twisty little passages.</p>
<p>Youre already in one of the alcoves studying the relief, so your
press yourself flat into the recess.</p>
<p>Three gophers with smoked glass goggles spill out from one of the
passages. Retrieval team 70! They made it past the egre after all!</p>
<p>They dont see you, but head straight to the keypad by the vault.
They crowd around it and start pressing buttons, arguing and bickering
with one another.</p>
<p>The sword at the bottom of the pool seems to roll its eye in
exasperation.</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DO?</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-08/msg00017.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-10">00011</h3>
<p>The Retrieval Team 70 gophers are absolutely losing their minds over
the ed terminal.</p>
<p>“It just keeps printing a question mark!” Vest sobs.</p>
<p>“Try pushing escape?” suggests Shorts somewhat panicking.</p>
<p>“Ive tried it! Its not vi! It doesnt do anything!” Vest moans.
“Here you try it if youre so smart!”</p>
<p>Sash is balled up on the floor crying, having already had a turn at
the terminal.</p>
<p>Shorts carefully steps over them and timidly prods at the keypad.</p>
<p>A throng of beefy guard kobits come charging into the hall, alerted
by the gopher racket.</p>
<p>“Here now! Youre not supposed to be in here!”</p>
<p>One of them trips over Sash, still balled up on the floor, and
crashes into Shortss back, pinning them to wall. They squeal. Another
guard grabs Vest by the collar, and after a brief scuffle all three
gophers are escorted out of the hall despite their howls of protest.</p>
<p>“I had better check on the vault!” exclaims one of the kobits who
remains behind.</p>
<p>They bang a few keys on the terminal and it spits out a slip of
paper.</p>
<pre><code>ed v1.6
19
P
*,n
1 the door is locked
*1s/locked/open
?
*H
no match
*1s/Locked/Open
the door is Open
*wq
17</code></pre>
<p>There is a mechanical whir deep in the walls, and a click and a gasp
of air as the door swings inward.</p>
<p>The kobit slips into the vault and the door swings only partly closed
behind it.</p>
<p>The sword in the bottom of the pool pointedly narrows its eye at
you.</p>
<p>The gods of Basmentaria observe passively from their reliefs in the
alcoves around you.</p>
<p>The door to the vault is ajar, the first of the five legendary
Ginnarak crystals presumably behind it.</p>
<p>From one of the twisty little passages, you hear a guard kobit
approaching, singing a sad cowboy song to itself.</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DO</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-09/msg00001.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-11">00012</h3>
<blockquote>
<p>Harrumph I say as I billow out my mustache. I know exactly what this
is, Ive seen these silly terminals at the wizarding academy.
Fascinating little babbles really, not that easy to use, and I find
theyre easier to melt with a well placed fireball or two, but I think I
can get us past without that. Now I might need someone to cover for me
if that Kobit catches onto what Im doing, and Ill say the weird sword
is starting to creep me out a bit.</p>
<p>Corraidhin approaches the terminal, cracks his knuckles, and enters:
1,$p</p>
</blockquote>
<p>The printer spits out a piece of paper:</p>
<pre><code>The door is Locked</code></pre>
<blockquote>
<p>Corraidhin stares at the paper. Well, thats not right, the doors
only partially closed. Preposterious thing.</p>
<p>Thats okay, I know how to fix this.</p>
<p>19 c there is no door, there never was, and never will be. Also the
Kobit guard forgot to tie his shoes. . w 1,$p</p>
</blockquote>
<p>The printer spits out a slip of paper.</p>
<pre><code>there is no door, there never was, and never will be. Also the Kobit guard forgot to tie his shoes.</code></pre>
<p>With a soft pop, the thick stone door vanishes.</p>
<p>The sword at the bottom of the pool widens its eye in surprise.</p>
<p>Nothing remains between you and the interior of the vault.</p>
<p>Some light from the hall spills in and glints off what appears to be
a mound of gold, gems, and crystals. The rest of its contents are hidden
from view unless you venture inside.</p>
<p>You can still hear the guard kobit in the passage, now whistling a
warbling, lamentful tune. It sounds dangerously close. Best get a move
on if you want to avoid a confrontation.</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DO</p>
<blockquote>
<p>While the wisened scholar inspects the vault door, Inky walks a few
steps from the antechamber to meet the Kobit guard, pressure gauge and
tiny notebook in hand. Inky proceeds to ask them about water flow sounds
in the surrounding area, water stains, signs of potential pests that
could damage the pipes, and other rather boring elements pertaining to
modern Basmentia burrow plumbing.</p>
<p>After a while, seeing as they have been conversing for some time,
Inky pulls out two small bottles of chilled arrowroot beer from a waist
pouch and offers one to the Kobit guard.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>The big guard kobits eyes start to glass over as Inky goes on about
water pressure and structural integrity.</p>
<p>But it does graciously accept a bottle arrowroot beer.</p>
<p>“Well, golly, dont mind if I do!” It cracks the lid off, toasts to
your health and takes a long swig.</p>
<p>“Aaaaaaaah! That hits the spot!”</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Corraidhin absentmindedly inspects the terminal and door while Inky
converses with the guard. Hes utterly distracted and talking to
himself.</p>
<p>By the gods, its gone. Just like that! I thought itd fizzle or
something, but its gone! I wonder what else I can do with this
thing.</p>
<p>Corraidhin wanders back to the terminal and enters another
command.</p>
<p>19 c The wise and elderly Corraidhin is now a young and dashing
rogue, with a very nice hat. .</p>
</blockquote>
<p>The printer spits out a slip of paper:</p>
<pre><code>?</code></pre>
<p>Maybe the ed terminal only has jurisdiction over the door to the
vault.</p>
<p>Or maybe the machine, the universe, or whatever, is telling you not
to push your luck.</p>
<p>By now the big guard kobit, lulled by Inkys questions and finally
sedated by the alcohol, is slumped and snoring softly in the mouth of
one of the twisty little passages.</p>
<p>You stand before the open vault under the ever watchful gaze of the
sword at the bottom of the pool of water in the center of the room.</p>
<p>WHAT DO</p>
<h3 id="section-12">00013</h3>
<blockquote>
<p>Psst, Inky, can you poke your head into the vault, see if you can
spot any crystals. Also, can you tell what kind of golds in there?
Maybe its worth something to nab a piece of two for ourselves, you
know, since were so good at vault cracking.</p>
<p>While you do that Im going to take a closer look at this sword, its
giving me heeby jeebies.</p>
<p><em>I cast a spell on the sword to identify its physical, magical,
and metaphysical properties</em></p>
<p>“Strange sword, I command thee to divulge your secrets! All that you
are of, exist in, and imbue from shall be wrought in words of sorcercy
so that the world my see clear what you are!” I chant as I invoke
ancient runes with my wand.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Corraidhín commands the sword commandingly. But the sword just rolls
its eye and looks at him exasperatedly.</p>
<p>Hmm. Yes, no mouth. Well then.</p>
<p>Corraidhín draws on his mastery of Arcane Lore, and sifts through all
the knowledge he has filed away on magical swords. There are so many
books on magic swords!</p>
<p>While at first you guessed that it may merely be a common Look Sword,
you have since revised your initial assessment. Look Swords are minor
magical items, and are not quite as sentient as this particular blade
appears to be.</p>
<p>No this must be something a little more special.</p>
<p>Its hard to tell from herethe water is not perfectly clearbut the
pattern on the hilt is kind swirly and whirly. Probably a Sword of
Omens.</p>
<p>Unless…</p>
<p>No, its so unlikely.</p>
<p>And yet.</p>
<p>If the pattern on the hilt turns out to be more whirly than swirly,
then it probably is indeed a Sword of Omens.</p>
<p>But on the other hand, if it is more swirly than whirly, its
possible that this may be then legendary Sword of JSon.</p>
<p>If only you could get a closer look…</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Inky nods and peeks inside the vault, while keeping an ear open for
any sounds coming from the tunnel where the guard kobit is currently
sleeping soundly. Small mountains of ancient gold, some as coins and
some in nuggets of various shapes and sizes, filled most of the cavern
floor. In one corner were a few chests overflowing with rubies and
emeralds, with the occasional amethyst and tiny pink diamonds. Whoever
had this vault set up has amassed a nice hoard!</p>
<p>Inky whispered back, “Some good old gold! There are also little
crystals in one of the chests, but I cant tell if any of them is a
Ginnarak.”</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Inky hears the drunken cowboy Kobit guard snoring gently. It whistles
adorably a little bit at the top of each exhale.</p>
<p>You peek inside the vault just in time to see the lone Kobit guard
that went inside to check on the vault. It yelps and trips over its own
feet.</p>
<p>Its shoes were untied.</p>
<p>There are indeed piles of gold, gems, and crystals. Chests full of
precious stones. A few suits of armor. For some reason, a giant clam,
mouth open to reveal a giant pearl.</p>
<p>And in the center of it all, atop a stone pedestal, beneath a dome of
glass, is the blue and gold Ginnarak Crystal. It is the size of a melon,
and kind of shaped like one. A lumpy, multi-faceted blue and gold
melon.</p>
<p>Flitting around the pedestal are a couple of Aurs. Giant ears with
bat wings. Very keen hearing obviously. Usually more of an annoyance
than a true deterrent. Unless theres a Centaur around. Nasty things
those. A hundred ears with a hundred wings. The size of a small horse.
They can really ruin your day. Luckily you dont see one around.</p>
<p>Finally, curled up on the ground at the base of the pedestal, hugging
a mound of gold coins like a body pillow, is a nude Kobit, sound asleep.
It stretches briefly in its sleep and when it does, you are astonished
to see that it has large leathery wings.</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DO</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-09/msg00011.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-13">00014</h3>
<blockquote>
<p>Jarrod wanders into the vault. Spotting the Aurs and the Kobits, a
slow grin starts to spread on his face. Taking a deep breath in, he
gestures grandiosely around him and booms: “Ah! Come gather round! Hear
a tale of Triumph! Of Heart! … Maybe even a bit of Nirvana!”</p>
<p>He saunters over to the giant open clam and poses grandly nearby. His
eyes sweep across the Kobits, attempting to catch the eyes of each one,
as he begins to tap the fingers of his left hand rhythmically against
his thigh, mimicking a heartbeat.</p>
<pre><code>&quot;Our tale begins with a hero, though one not oft recognized,
Weaving bureaucratic mysteries across parchment with zeal,
Though held to account, and by all accounts terrorized,
By small minded yes-men with power and zeal!
Yes, our hero of sorts did not act and avail,
He gave others their tasks to be done.
No pleasure he gleaned from the mop or the pail,
And yet here we begin with the fun!&quot;</code></pre>
<p>Thus has the epic begun, and Jarrod is pushing the rhythm of the
words hard, attempting to draw all eyes and ears to himself.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Broad-chested, olive-skinned Jarrod launches into the epic, flanked
on one side by a giant clam and on the other side by a suit of
armor.</p>
<p>The aurs, enraptured, immediately flutter down to rest at his feet to
listen to the poem.</p>
<p>The one Kobit that tripped over its own feet rolls over where it lays
on the ground and listens with naked admiration.</p>
<p>The naked, winged Kobit rouses from its sleep at the noise with a
groan. It grouchily rises to its feet, flaps its wings a few times, and
soars up into the air.</p>
<p>“My name,” it cries out, “is HORSE! BhrruUHRHUuHRRh! Behold my
majesty! BrUHrhHHHURHuRu! You shall not steal my blue and gold,
melon-sized gem! BhrruUHRHUuHRRh! I have such beautiful WINGS!”</p>
<p>The aurs and the clumsy Kobit all start to fidget as Horses outburst
threatens to break the spell of Jarrods captivating oration.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>“Excellent!” Corradihin whispers to Inky nudging her gently as he
does. “It looks like Jarrod has the Kobits covered, Im gonna make a
break for the sword, Im decently, somewhat, sort of positive that its
the legendary sword of Jason. But if Im wrong and its cursed watch my
back. I might need a quick save.”</p>
<p>Corraidhin makes a step forward, “Oh and Inky, if Jarrods
distraction goes awry, shout, Ill come in fireballs blazing. I highly
suggest a rapid retreat if it comes to thay.”</p>
<p>Corraidhin darts towards the sword scrambling over the terrain while
the actions on the vault. As he approaches the sword he asks the sword
if it wouldnt mind coming along for a bit of adventure, and he grabs it
by the hilt.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Corraidhín wades resolutely into the pool. The water rises up to his
knees, his hips, his shoulders, and finally he dives under about 10 feet
to the bottom of the pool. The eye of the sword stares at him with great
intensity as he descends.</p>
<p>The mage reaches out and firmly grasps the hilt.</p>
<p>You feel a jolt, and the eye rolls back in its socket.</p>
<p>You yank on the sword and it budges not one bit. Not one iota!</p>
<p>You go to adjust your grip. But your hand is stuck fast! Glued to the
hilt of the sword!</p>
<p>You look up at the surface of the water, some 10 feet above.</p>
<p>You look down at the sword that refuses to release you.</p>
<p>You look more closely at the pattern on the hilt. Egads! Why did you
not see it before? The pattern is neither whirly nor swirly at all! It
is in fact kind of spacey and indented.</p>
<p>This is not the legendary Sword of Json! Its so obvious! How could
you have been so mistaken! This is none other than the infamous Sword of
Yaml. Yaml is of course a superset of Json, so it is an easy enough
error to make. And perfectly harmless in an academic setting. It is
however a costly miscalculation to make while glued to a sword at the
bottom of a fountain.</p>
<p>You lungs start to burn a little bit, and you hear a spectral,
burbling, significant whitespace voice in your head as the sword makes
intense eye contact with you:</p>
<pre><code>---
name: Yam&#39;l
conditions: {&quot;stuck&quot;: &quot;true&quot;, &quot;sticky&quot;: &quot;true&quot;}
greatest desire: stabbing
...</code></pre>
<p>And then an expectant pause, as though the sword eagerly awaits your
reply.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Inky watches Master Corraidhín make his way towards the creepy sword
with two drams of admiration and a tiny dose of apprehension. Taking out
a small wrench, a pouch of nuts and bolts, along with some gum twine,
Inky crouches near the vault archway, listening in a little on Jarrods
epic tale about the unsung hero of sanitation while occasionally looking
into the pool.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Inky, from the best seat in the house, hears Jarrod launch into an
epic poem, and also the beating of leathery wings and a mighty whinny
and a neigh.</p>
<p>They also watch Corraidhín dive to the bottom of the fountain, and
then thrash about a bit with one hand on the hilt of the eye sword.</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DO</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-09/msg00015.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-14">00015</h3>
<blockquote>
<p>Jarrod raises his right hand and begins adding a new rhythm to his
beat by slapping his palm against his chest. The resulting beat sounds
eerily like a galloping horse. Jarrod pushes his voice outward and
upward, directing his vocal energy at HORSE.</p>
<pre><code>&quot;A mighty steed did carry our hero through forest, hill and town:
A comely beast with silky mane and smooth and supple hide.
One would think that such a stallion needs must have renown,
But only our dear hero understood, and so did ride.&quot;</code></pre>
<p>Jarrod subtly adjusts the rhythm to a fast, regular beat.</p>
<pre><code>&quot;Lightning of the hoof!
Fire in the eye!
One with blowing wind!
Strength of mountain high!&quot;</code></pre>
<p>Jarrod slowly calms the beat back down to a heartbeat with his left
hand fingers on his thigh again. However, the right now rests close to
Gertrudes handle, at the ready.</p>
<pre><code>&quot;On fated day, our hero does require
Underlings for which a task is set.
And yet, this day the underlings and squires
Have booked their time away from toil and fret.&quot;</code></pre>
<p>While continuing the epic, Jarrod makes note of two options, should
he need them:</p>
<ol type="1">
<li>Should he need, he can dive behind the giant clam; and</li>
<li>He eyes a path back out the vault, should he be able to draw the
Aurs and Kobits out with him.</li>
</ol>
<p>Jarrod keeps his eyes on HORSE, attempting to react to whatever HORSE
brings.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>HORSE gives a snort, a groan, and a sigh as the beat of the poem
accelerates to a trot, and turns its subject to matters of its own
interest. Namely, himself. HORSE likes to hear its own name, and it
likes to hear people pay tribute to it with verse. Which is 100% what it
thinks is going on here.</p>
<p>HORSE beats its wings a few times and then flaps over to where Jarrod
is delivering his oration. It stands a little too close, basking in the
glory of Jarrods verse.</p>
<p>There is now gathered at Jarrods feet three Aurs; one clumsy Kobit
with untied shoe laces; and one naked, winged Kobit named HORSE.</p>
<p>The blue and gold, melon shaped crystal in the center of the vault
has been left unguarded. It hovers, suspended, beneath its glass dome on
top of its pedestal, revolving slowly in place. It looks like a weird
tiny asteroid. The veins of gold in the stone pulse lightly with
otherworldly energy.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Damn it Corraidhin thinks to himself, here I am yet again at the
bottom of some insipid pool stuck by some random magical thing all
because I didnt pay enough attention in mythical history class. Bloody
hell!</p>
<p>Good thing I paid attention in sorcery and yesteryears secrecry
administrivia, this little sword wont stay stuck for too long! My lungs
if I bungle this though..</p>
<p>Corraidhin quickly invokes a spell with his spare hand, casting
mystical runes with his hand.</p>
<pre><code>sudo chmod -t sowrd_of_yam\&#39;l
sudo chmod 775 sword_of_yam\&#39;l
sudo chown corraidhin:party sword_of_yam\&#39;l</code></pre>
<p>That should do it corraidhin thinks to himself. If not Im going to
need to think quick, Im stuck and theres no way up without this sword.
I might be able to transmute the water into air around me, but probably
only a small pocket which will surely disappear in a gasp. Alternately I
could try and blast my way down, creating a pocket for the water to flow
into, but Id be willing to bet Ill hurt myself in the process..</p>
</blockquote>
<p>You trace some watery runes, invoking Sudo to bend reality to your
will.</p>
<p>The unschooled masses sometimes erroneously assume that Sudo is a
deity in its own right. Theres a certain misguided logic to it: an
invisible force that governs the relationships between entities, and
infallibly predicts how they will behave? Certainly, it must be an all
powerful, godlike entity.</p>
<p>You and your ilk, of course, know that theres no more intelligence
behind Sudo than there is behind gravity. No need to correct them
though. Sometimes it behooves the mage to allow others to think that
they serve an unfathomable arcane lord.</p>
<p>There is a dull underwater flash and a muted underwater bang, and you
feel the sword slip from its stony clinch like a knife tearing through
soggy bread.</p>
<p>You push up off the bottom of the pool and rocket to the surface,
helpedsurprisinglyby the sword, which remains glued fast to your hand,
but which also rises above you as though somehow lighter than water.</p>
<p>You break the surface of the water and hear joyous laughter.</p>
<pre><code>&quot;Oh, yes! Well done, Hardy Bear! So very well done indeed! Oh, I had spent so long trapped at the bottom of that pool waiting for a new bear to come and free me. And now here you are! Oh, what a very good day this is. What a magnificent pair we shall be.
&quot;Now, let&#39;s go stab some evil!&quot;</code></pre>
<p>You look down at the sword in your hand, and the eye twinkles at you,
full of adoration and zeal.</p>
<p>A small wine pitcher splashes into the water next to you. It is
attached to a thin hose, at the other end of which Inky sits on dry
land, drinking a cup of tea. They wave.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Inky squints at the silhouette underwater, slightly distorted by the
occasional ripple on the surface, trying to decipher the odd hand
gestures and wisps of light coming from below. Why was Master Corraidhín
repeatedly forming semi-circles with his finger, almost like … the
handle of a teacup? Was it a request for tea?</p>
<p>After a pause, Inky rummages inside a bag and brings out a large
porro and a long rubber hose. The porro is filled with a demi-tasse of
black grapefruit pekoe from a flask and the spout plugged with an
eldarberry-flavoured gummy pen nib. Inky strings together a handful of
brass nuts with twine and ties it to the porros handle to act as a
small weight, then affixes the hose tightly to the open top of the
porro. Casting a slightly apologetic look in the direction of the water
for a brew long since gone cold, Inky swings the hose and flings the
drinking vessel into the pool towards Master Corraidhín, watching for a
moment as the porro sinks down into the water to hover near his arm. The
other end of the hose is tied securely to a narrow rock on one side of
the pool with more twine, the end sticking up in the air like a wiggling
snorkel.</p>
<p>Inky returns to crouching near the vault entrance and looking inside
another small pouch for fresh tea leaves. Waiting is thirsty work!</p>
</blockquote>
<p>You cast an improvised lifeline to the floundering wizard, and find a
cache of very fine fermented tea leaves wrapped in waxed paper that you
left for yourself at some point in the past. How thoughtful and
considerate of Past You!</p>
<p>From your vantage point, the sleepy guard Kobit still shows no sign
of stirring. And Jarrod has a throng of captive beasts listening very
intently to his stirring, epic poem. HORSE in particular seems to be
gaining some kind of physical sustenance from the words, snorting and
whinnying and beating its wings with each new stanza.</p>
<p>If you can slip through the doorway without disturbing them, there
will be nothing between you and the now vulnerable Ginnarak Crystal.</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DOOOOOO</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-09/msg00019.html">www</a></p>
<h3 id="section-15">00016</h3>
<p><em>RETCON!</em></p>
<p>Before Corraidhín ascended to the surface of the pool….</p>
<blockquote>
<p>As Corraidhin finishes his incantation a small porro drifts down
bonking him on the head. Startled corraidhin begins to move around in
the pool trying to find his assailant.</p>
<p>“By the gods what in the world is in this pool with me!” he tugs
frantically on the sword, and as he does so the porro drifts into view.
“Oh wait, that..” his eyes follow the rubber hose attached to it up to
the top of the pool. “Ah ha!” he exclaims immediately inhaling a mouth
full of water and frantically pulling the porro from the hose with his
spare hand and teeth. Corraidhin sucks greedily at the air the hose
provides as he becomes acutely aware of the burning sensation in his
lungs.</p>
<p>The porro drifts wistfully to the bottom of the pool, just out of
reach. A dark liquid rises from it as it comes to rest on the bottom of
the pool.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>And now back to our show!</p>
<blockquote>
<p>After heartily congratulating Master Corraidhín on his successful
sword acquisition in hushed whispers and finishing off a cup of
blackcurrant tea, Inky retrieves the porro from the bottom of the pool
with a fishing pole and a few recasts. (Calling that gnarly stick with a
line, bottle and hook slightly bent out of shape on one end a fishing
pole would be an affont to any self-respecting fisherfolk though.) Inky
rinses the pitcher and hose before stowing them away again in the bag
along with the pole and other ink brewing paraphernalia.</p>
<p>Refreshed, Inky slips noiselessly inside the vault, edging along the
wall on the farther side from the crowd now wholly enraptured by
Jarrods grand recital. Seeing the crowd pacified and giving Jarrod a
thumbs-up, Inky unfurls a long and dusty bolt of dark cloth with the
words “UNDER MAINTENANCE — NO UNAUTHORISED ENTRY [by order of the
Basmentaria Bureau of Sanitation]” in roughly-scrawled letters tacked
onto it, and hung the ends of the cloth so it spanned and completely
obscured one side of the vault.</p>
<p>Standing behind the makeshift inspection site, Inky proceeds to fill
several sacks with gold and gems using a small shovel, before putting
one of the sacks into their Hacky Duffer Discette (its capacity for
large storage and small weight is a blessing in disguise for both
aspiring and afflicted collectors alike).</p>
</blockquote>
<p>You successfully cordon off a corner of the vault and set up a very
convincing UNDER CONSTRUCTION banner. It looks straight up like a 90s
website.</p>
<p>You start shoving bags of treasure into your HD Discette, but it only
accepts 1.44 bags before running out of space. You you leave the
remaining bags for the others.</p>
<p>During your excavation, you find a complete set of magnificent,
ornate, gold-nibbed quills, and also a small wooden rack of bottled
ink.</p>
<p>There are a dozen small bottles all arranged in a row, each one with
a different mysterious glyph, the contents all a slightly different
shade. As you handle the rack, the ink sloshes around inside. It could
still be good!</p>
<p>The fine wooden rack encloses them all and holds them in place by
means of the lid, which closes securely around the bottle necks. Once
you open the lid, you can easily retrieve and stow the bottles.</p>
<p>You also spot a fine jade teapot. A matching set of small cups—no
handles, no saucers—cluster around the pot like nursing pups.</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Corraidhin clambors out of the pool, magical pokey stick in hand.</p>
<p>Good show! He exclaims to himself and the sword. Now I can finally
get a good look at this sword, though for some reason I cant seem to
let go, I guess for now I wont lose it.</p>
<p>You said you wanted to do some stabbin right? Of evil things? What
constitutes evil my pointy new friend?</p>
</blockquote>
<p>The sword does indeed remain steadfastly glued to your hand. As you
swish it around you discover that it seems to get lighter when you hold
it aloft, and that it trembles and grows increasingly heavy as it
descends. The sensation is almost as though it has a hollow core in
which some kind of heavy liquid sloshes around. And as though its blow
would be devastating.</p>
<p>The sword relishes being wielded and swung, and grows more and more
ecstatic. Its eye darts menacingly back and forth, vanquishing imaginary
enemies with each jab.</p>
<pre><code>Yes! Yes, I am made for a singular purpose. To RID EVIL. To root out evil, spill its blood, and then do it again! So let&#39;s go find some evil, Bear! And then you can just stab it with me.
Oh, what constitutes evil, you ask? In my experience, evil can&#39;t help but make itself known. You&#39;ll know it when you see it.
For example, see there? That little inky fellow sneaking into that treasure room? Probably super evil. We should go investigate.</code></pre>
<blockquote>
<p>As corraidhin questions the sword he wanders towards the vault
peering in to inspect Jarrods performance. Hes really good at that,
what do you think? Actually what do I even call you? Do you like
nicknames? I was thinking pointy, or stabby, but Im open to
suggestions, respect and all that.</p>
<p>Oh hey, the crystal! It looks like its unguarded! Corraidhin slinks
towards the crystal muttering to his magical sword as he does.</p>
</blockquote>
<p>The sword is momentarily distracted by the Aurs and Kobits. Its eye
widens. It almost seems to shudder with anticipation.</p>
<pre><code>EEEEEVIL! Rid. Evil. Spill. Repeat.</code></pre>
<p>You are thankful that the voice seems only to be heard inside your
own head.</p>
<pre><code>Oh, my name? I&#39;m sure I had one at some point. Long forgotten by now. No matter, I&#39;m not sad about it. One has no use for a name when instead they have a singular, all-consuming purpose!
But, my last Bear called me her Bee. I quite liked that. The bee in her bonnet! Ha! Evil, fear my sting!</code></pre>
<p>The sword prattles on in your head as you sneak past Jarrods
monstrous storytime and approach the pedestal. Or is it a lectern?</p>
<p>You arrive unseen. The crystal is a dazzling deep blue, with pulsing
gold veins. It is oddly shaped, somewhat like an egg. And it floats,
rotating slowly, suspended in air beneath the glass dome that encloses
it.</p>
<p>Drawing on your knowledge of Arcane Lore, you remember that the five
Ginnarak Crystals played a key role in the Artifice Wars that once
rampaged across all of Basmentaria. They are sources of tremendous
power. Some say that, the five of them together, they could kill a god.
Youre not sure you believe that. But they did definitely reduce the
once lush and verdant island nation of Ginnarak to cinder wastes and
deserts of ash. A cataclysmic event that put a resolute end to the
Artifice Wars.</p>
<p>You look around the vault. Jarrod is reciting epic poetry and
mesmerizing the monsters. Inky is pillaging and looting. You have a
bloodthirsty, sentient sword in one hand; and a large arcane battery of
a crystal within reach of the other.</p>
<p>WHAT DO YOU DO</p>
<p><a
href="https://framalistes.org/sympa/arc/tildepals/2022-09/msg00023.html">www</a></p>
<h2 id="bestiary">Bestiary</h2>
<p>Some of the creatures who inhabit the world of Basmentaria</p>
<dt>
<dl>
<dt>Aur</dt>
<dd>
Giant ears with bat wings. Very keen hearing obviously. Usually more of
an annoyance than a true deterent. Unless theres a Centaur around.
</dd>
<dd>
<details>
<figure>
<img src="aur.png" alt="aur" />
<figcaption aria-hidden="true">aur</figcaption>
</figure>
</details>
</dd>
</dl>
<dt>
<dl>
<dt>Blahoblin</dt>
<dd>
a little goblinoid with the head of a goblin shark
</dd>
<dd>
<details>
<figure>
<img src="goblin.gif" alt="blahoblin" />
<figcaption aria-hidden="true">blahoblin</figcaption>
</figure>
</details>
</dd>
</dl>
<dt>
<dl>
<dt>Centaur</dt>
<dd>
A hundred ears with a hundred wings. The size of a small horse. They can
really ruin your day.
</dd>
<dd>
<details>
<figure>
<img src="centaur.png" alt="centaur" />
<figcaption aria-hidden="true">centaur</figcaption>
</figure>
</details>
</dd>
</dl>
<p>
</p>
<dl>
<dt>Egre</dt>
<dd>
Giant muscle bird. Proud, muscly, vain, fashion forward. Beautiful
plumage.
</dd>
<dd>
<details>
<figure>
<img src="egre.png" alt="egre" />
<figcaption aria-hidden="true">egre</figcaption>
</figure>
</details>
</dd>
</dl>
<p>
</p>
<dl>
<dt>Gnome</dt>
<dd>
Tiny tinkerers. Highly combustible. Very explosive. Like making
contraptions powered by steam and/or coal
</dd>
<dd>
All gnomes are women. All gnomes are engineers. They have bright red
noses, and very long ears. And long nimble fingers.
</dd>
<dd>
<details>
<figure>
<img src="gnome.gif" alt="gnome" />
<figcaption aria-hidden="true">gnome</figcaption>
</figure>
</details>
</dd>
</dl>
<dt>
<dl>
<dt>Kobit</dt>
<dd>
Subterranean scaly ratdog creatures. Big luminous eyes, long droopy
mustaches. Extremely rarely, they may grow leathery wings, in which case
they are revered and elevated by the other kobits.
</dd>
<dd>
<details>
<figure>
<img src="kobit.png" alt="kobit" />
<figcaption aria-hidden="true">kobit</figcaption>
</figure>
</details>
</dd>
</dl>
<dt>
<dl>
<dt>Torque</dt>
<dd>
The twisted people. Their bodies literally twisted and warped by magic
into gruesome forms, these wretched creatures are hated and reviled
across the lands.
</dd>
<dd>
<details>
<figure>
<img src="torque.jpg" alt="torque" />
<figcaption aria-hidden="true">torque</figcaption>
</figure>
</details>
</dd>
</dl>
<dt>
<dl>
<dt>Toque</dt>
<dd>
Wild men of the mountains. Their long, sloping, vertically-creased
foreheads and their bulbous, floppy skullcaps make it look like they
wear chefs hats. But no, thats just what their heads look like.
</dd>
<dd>
<details>
<figure>
<img src="toque.jpg" alt="toque" />
<figcaption aria-hidden="true">toque</figcaption>
</figure>
</details>
</dd>
</dl>
<h2 id="geography">Geography</h2>
<p>Basmentaria</p>
<ul>
<li>Primora: northern banana
<ul>
<li>VayNullar</li>
<li>Tammineaux Forest</li>
<li>Gnomelands</li>
<li>RanaFor Valley</li>
</ul></li>
<li>Agendell: southern banana</li>
<li>Ginnarak: donut hole</li>
</ul>
<p>names to integrate: tildetown, commonhealth of casakhstan,
federation</p>
<h2 id="cosmology">Cosmology</h2>
<p>trine:</p>
<ul>
<li>Neddas the god of sages and starlight</li>
<li>Nullar the god of time and tides</li>
<li>Liandt the goddess of war and flame</li>
</ul>
<p>Fourth god = ????</p>
<h2 id="history">History</h2>
<p>Long ago, the Artifice Wars ravaged the lands of Basmentaria.</p>
<p>They reduced the once fertile lands of Ginnarak to ash and
embers.</p>
<h2 id="spoilers">Spoilers</h2>
<h3 id="names">names</h3>
<p>Upcoming NPCs and/or monsters?</p>
<pre><code>07:10 ~mio | lol okay, we can call it zai-ni for a day
07:10 ~mio | tiny zeyeknee</code></pre>
<p>Pirates?</p>
<h3 id="crystals">crystals</h3>
<p>the five Ginnarak crystals:</p>
<ul>
<li>earth cave</li>
<li>water underwater pirate shipwreck</li>
<li>fire volcano</li>
<li>wind cloudstuff</li>
<li>heart? ice?</li>
</ul>
<h3 id="hodgepodge">hodgepodge</h3>
<p>mios (Inkys) Handy Duffer Discette = HD Diskette = better stay away
from magnets!!</p>
<p>The Benefactor is Nullar</p>
<p>Blavin is a secret agent, working for the Golden Iris, a secret
society that wants to create balance by seating a fourth god</p>
<p>Nullar got tired of being a god and wanted to die, and Neddas agreed
to help him. Shit went bad and turned Liandt to stone, and Nullars leg
to stone.</p>
<p>Now Nullar is trying to gather the Ginnarak crystals to assemble the
<em>God Slayer</em> to attempt once more to end his own life.</p>
<p>The gang has a rival: the gophers of Retrieval Team 70</p>
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