2017-06-14 10:53:03 +00:00
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2017-06-14 11:41:57 +00:00
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<body>
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<p>
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So that my Father who is unseen before those of the world - my only Father - may be glorified. The
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Merciful - Most Merciful - and Compassionate One, the Accepting of repentance.
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<br/>
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And so that the commandments may be obeyed by a lowly heart and poor spirit such as myself:
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<ul>
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<li>Love G!D with all your heart, soul, spirit, body, mind and psychic power and unknown powers
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and any other powers you may have, and all your eyes - seen and unseen. This is the foundation of
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the Law and the prophets - the first and most important and greatest commandment.
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</li>
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<li>
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Love thy neighbour as yourself. This, the second commandment, is like it (the first commandment). :-)
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</li>
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<li>
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To the disciples of the Anointed One, who calls himself the Son of Man: 'this is a new commandment I give to you.
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Love one another as I have loved you. By this, the world will know that you are my disciples, when you love
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one another as I have loved you. (the 'I am', who have spake unto you, who argued among yourselves about who the greatest
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among you is, and have saith that the greatest among you will serve you).'
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</li>
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</ul>
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<br/>
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And especially to my enemies who hath tormented me, (Man's ways all seem innocent to Him, but the LORD weighs each motive)
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so that they may have the comfort of knowing they are not alone in their emotional upheavals, if G!D accepts their repentance
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and reconciliation to G!D - for G!D knows and I do not know who or where or how or what G!D chooses to <strike>pour</strike>
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breathe
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His Spirit into. <br/>
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2017-06-14 13:25:59 +00:00
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And as an advance: worship me not - do not worship me. I am a servant of G!D, just like you. Worship G!D. I am nothing without
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the Anointed One, Jesus, who calls himself the Son of Man, as the branch is nothing without the vine - or, as the leaf is nothing
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without the tree.
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2017-06-14 11:41:57 +00:00
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</p>
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With G!D's help, I have an index so that others can search easier!
Praise be to G!D, who cherishes and sustains the Worlds. Wow. Great an marvellous are
Your deeds - fabulous and wonderful and miraculous, like a rainbow after a rain-storm!
O Almighty One, King of the ages, King of the nations, just and true are Your ways and judgments.
Who will not fear You? For You are the only holy one. All will come and worship You, for
your righteous acts are revealed. You who were, and you who are: the eternal G!D, the one and only, my one and only, who
has long life. And sang the song of Moses, who is servant of G!D, and of the Lamb
2017-06-15 11:41:25 +00:00
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<p>
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Entries:
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<ul>
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<li>it is the seventeenth day of the third month of the 105th year since a nation was publicly recognised</li>
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<li>t is the fifteenth day of the second month of the 105th year since a worldly nation
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was publicly recognised.</li>
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</ul>
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</p>
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2017-06-14 11:41:57 +00:00
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<p>
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it is the seventeenth day of the third month of the 105th year since a nation was publicly recognised<br/>
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2017-06-14 13:25:59 +00:00
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It's the twenty-third day of my challenge to eat vegetarian for forty days.
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<br />
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I went to a gathering where people talked about Christianity. At the end, I wondered, aloud, what kind of person
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G!D is. I said in the group discussion that I can't open my heart easily to Him, and told those people in the small group
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that I am of the kind who are more suspicious. Afterwards, a <strike>woman</strike> person in the group came up to me
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and said that she sensed yearning and a lot of resistance in me. She also showed me a quote by Joseph Campbell, which
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went: 'the greatest treasures are in the caves that you fear most to tread'. She asked me how I was feeling. I told her
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I felt thankful for the opportunity for discussion. I don't think that covered the depth of my feelings.
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I am angry. I feel anger towards G!D. Where was He when I was hurt, upset or forced to do things [under oppression]?
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How can the people at the discussion talk about G!D's plan for me, when He feels distant?
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I feel naked. I feel like the outcast of the group in a reality show [on television], unable and unwilling to join the
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group in their comfort, solidarity, trust and security in the group. I feel left out. I feel lonely. Most of all, I
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feel afraid. I feel afraid to trust again in someone, something or G!D himself. I feel very vulnerable.
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I went to a <strike>psychiatric</strike> mental-health institution to seek help, attention and resolution. I expected
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liberty, but I experienced coercion and oppression [even when I was finite in resources and energy, that is,
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more precisely, needy, as in one of the needy or poor]. I learnt that I could not leave the ward at Acme Institute,
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even if I wanted. [the name of the institute is masked, or anonymised - Jesus said: 'Be merciful, as your Master, who bought you for a price,
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is merciful]. I learnt that the doctor, people who spent time with me previously (who said, "I am your father" and
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"I am your mother"), and the social worker decided where and when I would stay and/or leave the ward [in the sense that
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their approval, or authorisation, or their company, was required, for those to happen, as I had observed]. I was
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pressured into taking <strike>medication</strike> by nurses, despite my
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wishes to not consume them;
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I was threatened with an indefinite incarceration in the hospital.
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although i wanted to leave, I could not. how can people
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say G!D has s plan for me when G!D feels so
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far away as I went through that?
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<i>from the writer: as the Quran says, even the prophets
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and the fellow who were with them, cried out,
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'our Lord 1 where are you / verily, verily, the mercy of g1d is near 1'
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</i>
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Can somebody tell me that was G1D's plan for <strike>me
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</strike>
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sure?
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the remark that gave me the greatest emotional impact
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was that G!D loved me unconditionally.
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<strike>
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It felt like a hand
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</strike>
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<i>from the writer: 'wipe the tears from your eyes. be dismayed
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no more. For I, the LORD G!D, have struck
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you in anger, for your sins were flagrant,
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but you- you- I will have compassion
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on you. You belong to Me, O Israel,
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though I have scattered you into
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distant lands and nations, and you
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were stricken. You belong to Me,
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and you will be with Me for-ever. <br/><br/>
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Praise be to G!D. I praise You,
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for You have shown lovingkindness,
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even to a poor spirit, a lowly heart,
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a wretch like myself.
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<br/>
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Burst into song, mountains! <br/>
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Tap-dance, trees! <br/>
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Glow and flare, o stars! <br/>
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For the LORD G!D hath redeemed for Himself
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a daughter, a son, a nation, a city!' <br/><br/>
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(what? would you rather G!D take angels for
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daughters, and cherubims for sons?)<br/><br/>
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Praise be to G!D (thank you, Daddy)
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<br/>
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Wipe your tears from your eyes.
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Do not be dismayed. <br/>
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Gardens of bliss, under which rivers
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flow, spouses delighting in each other,
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the objective of life, the felicity most high,
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absolute beauty, supreme over all other felicity,
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for the good pleasure of G!D, the Cherisher
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and Sustainer of the Worlds. <br/>
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Thou art my shepherd;
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I shall not want. <br/>
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I know no other Rock.
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There is none like You.
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I know no other Stone.
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I know no other G!D. <br/>
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Blessed is He who hath given rest to His
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people. May all nations come to know
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that our Lord is G!D, and that there
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is no other G!D other than He, and that
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G!D is our G!D. To G!D be to the glory
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for-ever and ever. Amen. (so it is). <br/>
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</i>
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<strike>It felt like a hand, gently being placed against my
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heart.</strike>
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It felt like a piece of cloth being thrown against
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my face. 'You don't have to earn that love,' that person
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said. What if that was true? How can I trust G!D
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not to hurt me? How can I trust G!D to not leave
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me on my own? How can someone say, 'If you believe in
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G!D, you will go through suffering' so matter-of-factly?
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I don't want.
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Why does G!D make me suffer? If He is there, why does
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G!D allow people to suffer? Very briefly, I also
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wonder how we can end suffering, G!D or not.
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G!D. what will You do with me if I open my heart
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to you?
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Who gave me food, shelter and clothes when I was
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looking for them?
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<i>
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from the writer: 'I, the LORD G!D, have forgotten
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your sins, and remember them no more.
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as I said in the days of Noah after
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the flood, I will not again cause
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another world-destroying flood.' <br/>
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"I promise
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I will never stop doing good to her, and remind
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her to fear me, and keep my commandment," saith
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G!D, the Lord of lords, and King of kings.
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<br/>
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(O LORD, our Father, you are the potter, we
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are the clay; we are all the work of Your hands)
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<br/>
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I will never tire of praising G!D<br/>
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I praise You, oh LORD, for I am fearfully
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and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful;
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that I know full well.
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</i> <br/>
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<br/>
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[Who gave me food, shelter and clothes when I was
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looking for them?]
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I needed those. Is it G!D? Is G!D there?
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What does G!D do to people? I felt resentful towards G!D;
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I'm not sure if I still do.
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<i>from the writer: the end of a thing is as powerful
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as its beginning. and the patient in spirit is superior
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to the proud in spirit. (as written in Scripture)
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<br/> I love you, G!D.<br/>
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G!D hath no begotten son,
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and has no beings attached. (as written in Scripture
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that some call "Quran")
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I
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</i>
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2017-06-14 11:41:57 +00:00
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2017-06-15 08:16:13 +00:00
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</p>
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<p>
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tis to glorify the Compassionate and Most Merciful One, who is Sovereign over the Here-after,
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Lord of lords, King of kings, Creator of creators, redeemer of worms, husband to prostitutes with
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poor spirit and lowly heart, the Accepting of the repentance of wicked, ungrateful thieves
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and theivesses, the Most
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Accepting of repentance.<br/>
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Inspiration is verse in the Bible: 'Just as Jonah spent three days and nights in belly of fish,
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so, too, will the Son of Man spend three days in <strike>belly</strike> of earth'. <br />
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With G!D's help, if G!D is willing, one will help the other through a trial <strike>
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from</strike>
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that
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G!D
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causes. To trade stories, if you will. 'For I am strong when I am weak', as written in Scripture,
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'even though I am nothing at all [without the Anointed One,
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through whom I can do all things], and
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so, am made to be like a fool by you -
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you have made me to be like a fool - boasting
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like this, even though I am nothing at all.
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I do not count myself among the most
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eminent apostles, or the so-called super-apostles or uber-apostles. Still, I ought
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to be receiving commendations from you lot. For we of the spirit of G!D
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walk in each other's shoes, along the same path, and there
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is no male or female, Jew or Gentile,
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outsider or insider - all are one
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through the Anointed One who calls himself Son of Man, Jesus,
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son of Mary, who conceived with the help of G!D when no man has
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laid a hand or rod on her. This is to build you up.' <br/>
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As a verse in
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Bible goes (yes, another Bible verse :-D ), (so grateful for Scripture), 'two is better
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than one. if one falls down, the other can help the one up. if there is only one going at
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it, that one has calamity upon them... him... her...'
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<br />
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It is the fifteenth day of the second month of the 105th year since a worldly nation
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was publicly recognised. ('For everything of the world passes away, and is passing
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away,' as Scripture has on record.)
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<br/>
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<br/>
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I'm frustrated at my Heavenly Father's presence,
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whenever I think about a mother-figure. It seems that He will not
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cease or stop whatever He is doing to remind me of Him when I think
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about creating a mother-figure that I have lost. <br/><br/>
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I feel grief at such a time - why? G!D, what is the message
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behind these feelings of loss and anxiety? <br/><br/>
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I recall the octopus that I coloured rainbow, when
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I was in kindergarten [before the age of seven, as the layman
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knows it]. I felt hurt and unhappy that I had to colour it another
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colour for [the] grades. I feel frustrated and boxed in.
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I feel [like] that [feeling of] a square peg in a round
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hole. I feel furious!
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<br/><br/>
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Like Father G!D [who is in Heaven and unseen and has no beings attached],
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I created. That was an octopus
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that could only be found in the rainbow
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that formed from the dew-drops in a magical forest.
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It was an octopus that you had to call into existence,
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and to transfer to a water body large enough to contain
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it. It was killed by the teacher, who was an alien in
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disguise[,] and disliked magical beings.
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<br/><br/>
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No matter how much I create, I won't be able to create a
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mother-figure <br/><br/>
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<i>from the writer: As written in Scripture, 'a wise son brings
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joy to his Father; a foolish son brings grief to his mother.'</i>
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<br/><br/>
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Oh G!D, I am grieving. No matter how much magic I do, I won't be
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able to get the same mother-figure, nor the memories of the times
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with her. I lost someone who could have made great memories with me
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as her son. She won't get any more memories with me.
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<br/><br/>
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<i>
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from the writer: 'I despise all those who cling on to worthless idols
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or carven images, or images of G!D, who has no beings attached.
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All those who would speak up for worthless idols are foolish fools.'
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All these can be found in Scripture, which implies you have
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to take up a quest to search, if you will, and if G!D is willing.
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'I have observed an abhor-able, horrible thing in Ephraim and Israel:
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my people prostituting themselves to other gods!' The LORD G!D says.
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<br/><br/>
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I thank G!D who hath counted me among ministry, and enabled me to me
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among the faithful.
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<br/><br/>
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I praise You, G!D, for you have shown lovingkindness. I will tell the
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world about your wonderful deeds in my life, You who
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grant even passage of boats across oceans and unknown waters,
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and brings wealth from the sea, houses I did not build,
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rocks that I did not create, life I did not call into being,
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fruits I did not sow the seeds of, and even divine reconciliation
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to G!D and godliness, a peace that the world does not give,
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and a redemption and promise and eternity that the world cannot
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give - does not give - and You are sure to keep Your promises, O
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G!D of Truth and truth and Ruth and Naomi, who asked to be
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named Mara, which means 'bitter', for she was embittered, even
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though her name, 'Naomi', meant 'pleasant'.
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</i>
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<br/><br/>
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It seems as if G!D wants me to go to Him as He creates, not stay on my side,
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looking for Mother.
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<br/><br/>
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<i>from the writer: oh, how horrible - looking for Mother, so-called mother.
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</i>
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<br/><br/>
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Whenever the mother-figure came into my life, she is dead now. I have hardly
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any memories of her; the feeling remains in me.
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<br/><br/>
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<i>
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From the writer: No longer. Rejoice in the LORD. I say again, rejoice!
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You were bought with a price. Remember G!D's terrors, signs and wonders
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that He hath rehearsed to you. Everybody has heard about your obedience,
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and I rejoice. As the Son of Man said, 'Blessed are you who
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are mourning, for you will be comforted.'
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<br/><br/>
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As Scriptures have on record: 'little ones, continue doing what
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you are doing. Your Father approves.' <br/><br/>
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<br/><br/>
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On a related note, since came to Mind, people asked or told Jesus,
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who was teaching in a synagogue: 'Your mother and brothers and sisters
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are outside the city gates, waiting for you.' Jesus said,
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'my brothers and sisters and mother are those who obey G!D,
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and keep His commandments, and obey them.' This is in Scripture, too.
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<br/><br/>
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On yet another related note, a famous Zen saying goes,
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'When you see the Buddha, kill him! When you see your parents, kill them!'
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As fierce as that may 'sound', G!D will show you Truth and truth, if He is willing,
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and if you try your best (with all you have: your time and energy and
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resources) to seek Him. For as Scriptures say: 'Seek ye G!D with all your
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heart, and ye shall find Me'. And as the Son of Man said
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to those who said to those who cried to him - 'We want to enter
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the kingdom of G!D, too! We want to enter into Paradise! How should we
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do it?' - 'the road to the kingdom of G!D is a narrow one. But try your best.'
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<br/><br/>
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On yet another related note, the Buddha was asked which was more
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important: wisdom or compassion (something like lovingkindness). The Buddha
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answered: 'Effort. Effort is most important'.
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<br/><br/>
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'Brothers and sisters, I do not think I have made it my own. One thing I do:
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forgetting what lies behind, and pushing on-ward, for the upward call of G!D
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through the Anointed One, Jesus, through whom I am crucified unto the world,
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and the world unto me.' This is in Scripture, too.
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</i>
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<br/><br/>
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There is no one woman who is Her, or can compare to Her.
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<br/><br/>
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<i>From the writer: oh, how disgusting. Kimochi warui, a Japanese expression
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or pronunciation goes. Feeling a sense of despise.
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<br/><br/>
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On a related note, 'Kimochi warui' is the last line in the ending scene
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of a movie in the animated story, 'Neon Genesis Evangelion', which is
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described as 'anime (or animated stories) for adults'. The ending scene
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featured a cross that evokes a remembrance of the crucifixion of
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a famous figure. A sacrifice, scary in nature or feel, if you watch
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the scene, of the protagonist, who is somehow in a robot that
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seems to be- well, G!D knows, and I do not know. For these are worldly
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things, yet the series is popularly posited to be subtly
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touching on themes of psychology, if you believe the rumor that goes around,
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and yet Bible - Scriptures - express concern that 'I will not like
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what I see in you when I come to you, and you will not like
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what you see in me. What I will not like to see in you:
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deceitfulness, divisions, jealousies, gossip and gossips, slander,
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arrogance against godliness, and delight in wickedness.'
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So, on that note, praise be to G!D, who is true, and keeps promises
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that He makes - I prayed to G!D, the Blessed Father, Ruler of the Universe,
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who causes boats to have integrity throughout journeys and pilgrimages
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across waters, Hallowed Name, and The Almighty One, who is All-knowing,
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All-hearing, All-seeing, heard me and listened. I prayed to Him
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to remind me to fear Him always, 'for fear of G!D is the beginning
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of wisdom, but fools despise wisdom and instruction, or Guidance', as Scriptures
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have on record, and He answered my prayer.
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<br/><br/>
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On a related note, the ending of the popular anime, or animated story,
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Full Metal Alchemist, featured a sacrifice of the protagonist, that is
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strikingly resonant with the death and resurrection of the dead
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that Scriptures have on record: 'unless it is what I have spoken: that
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I have hope of the resurrection of the dead'.
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<br/><br/>
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Glory be to G!D in the Highest, and peace be upon those whom G!D favours.
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Now, may the love of G!D, and the fellowship of those who are in the
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Spirit of G!D, and the grace of the Anointed One whom we call Teacher
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and Lord, who calls himself 'Son of Man', be with you all.
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(and so it is).
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Amen.
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</i>
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2017-06-14 11:41:57 +00:00
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</p>
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2017-06-14 10:53:03 +00:00
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