Don't leave me ok, Daddy
You said
'Call to G!D, and G!D will
show you great
and mighty things
that you do not know,
and I do not know'
Jehovah
I need Your help
on the behalf of
the Anointed One
the one whom G!D sent
I need Your help
And why is that
because G!D knows how to
help this perverse generation
an'
I do not know
Yes
G!D knows
and I do not know
For I would not, brethren, that ye should be ignorant of this mystery, lest ye should be wise in your own conceits; that blindness in part is happened to Israel, until the fulness of the Gentiles be come in.
(Romans 11:25)
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Romans+11%3A25&version=KJV
So, wo-
(feeling tired)
oh- yes, toxic people around me,
oh- feeling better, much better, Papa in Heaven,
great, energising or re-energising, and marvellous
are Your deeds, Almighty One.
Sang song of Moses, who is servant of G!D,
and of the Lamb.
Anna, a very old woman,
a señorita
(a saying from the Chinese language: '
the old ginger is the spicy ginger, the ginger
that has sufficient kick to taste-buds'
ha-ha-ha-ha (laughing))
señorita, señor, senile, derived from the word
(Latin maybe) 'sen', which means 'old'. related
note, this is, since G!D has given me such an
argument - of course, this is a supposition,
a claim, which may or may not be true - false knowledge,
as valid an argument nonetheless as the argument that
follows: 'the moon is blue'
there is book titled 'everything is an argument' if you
are interested, but beginning godless chatter- so-
Anna, señorita, seventy-eight years
and eighty-seven days old, widowed, who did
nothing except fasting and praying to G!D, and praising
G!D of course, in temple, took the new-born
(the Anointed One, that is) into her arms, with
the permission of those were holding him,
and thanked G!D, and sang praises to G!D.
And returned the Anointed One, new-born,
to the arms of those who had held him.
And Joseph (the man) and Mary, mother of
the Anointed One, who had conceived with help of
G!D, and help of no man, returned with the Anointed
One to their home-town.
'Are we to continue
in our transgressions
or past sins
or wrong-doings
against G!D -
that is, are we
do things that
G!D detests -
are we to continue
in ways dis-pleasing
to G!D so that
grace
or forgiveness may
abound?
Is it not written
in Scriptures the following
words: '
I am afraid that when I come
to you my god will humble
me before you, and I will
be grieved to see that
many of you
have not repented of
(or dissociated yourselves from)
your past
sins
(or, wrong-doings
which you know,
and which you have received
pardon for, through
the one and only
eternal
sacrifice
of our Teacher and Lord,
Jesus Christ, (whom I am not above),
wrong-doings, oh, like what? Such as:
- idol worship. taking
a being before G!D, who has
no beings attached, for worship.
Golden statues of a sitting figure,
bowls of ceramic,
plastic blocks that burn eyes,
piles of flesh,
bags of bones
sacks of intestines
- lustful pursuit for things
of the world, ah, lustful
indulgences of desires
for things that are of the world
(is it not written in Scriptures
that everything of the world,
together with the world, is passing away)
(I feel a nasty feeling.
I am of course hated by many,
for they are of the world,
and G!D sent one who chose me
out of the world,
for that reason they hate me.
Putting psychological perspectives
aside
it might be better for you
to think I am an extra-terrestrial,
which is what some call what-they-call,
more accurate and better for you
to regard me as an E.T.
using words that are suitable for
your consumption
in a language that you know.
And you may begin
o- not asking for sympathy,
the reason why they hate me.)
- sexual matters that-
ah- I feel as if I ought to say
a few G!D-fearing words:
too many people
have secrets
and shame that they
carry
and it would be no surprise
that they inflict wounds on
others' well-being, sexually
or other-wise, through their
own unhealed emotions
or experiences. Suffice to say, (or not;
I'm concerned what about to say might
not be sufficient to please G!D in fear of
G!D. Still, trying)
quoting from a book from
Señorita Clarissa (who is not above
G!D, of course) those who regard
changes in the body
given to Man (or woman)
as evil (G!D knows what evil
is and I
do not know)
(continue to quote)
they are terribly confused
about G!D-given bodies,
confused about body, they are.'
So, cutting or mutilation of vaginas,
nsistence on so-called pure behaviour,
isolation of menstruating women,
periods, that is,
ways that teach people to feel
shame about what feels good -
masturbating, even -
unnecessary guilt-inflicting -
well, our Teacher and Lord has this to say:
'You say to your brother, your
friend, your menstruating stranger:
'Here, friend, stranger, let me,
as awkward as this may be for you,
let me take the pin out of your eye!
You hypocrite! Take the log
out of your own eye first!
Then you can see clearly
to help your friend, your menstruating
stranger (that is, having menses),
the one whom you call brother, bro,
abang, adik, sister!'
That's our Lord and Teacher for you,
who of course, was hated by the world,
and died for you and me and those
who are of the world. I suppose
an admission of my own faults
or wrong-doings is in order.
I'm even hastening to count myself
among the wicked and ungrateful;
it is written in words that have
breath of G!D in them:
'G!D is kind to the wicked and
ungrateful'
(of course, that does
not mean
that we- are we
to continue to wicked
and ungrateful ways,
now that we have pardon
from G!D Most High - a divine
pardon that the world does not give -
so that wrong-doers may receive
yet more pardon from above?
Certainly, that ought not to be the case,
brethren who are in the same family
as I.
So, yes, I do not want to continue
in my older sins.
How-ever shameful they may seem,
it may be healing to you and to me,
to confess them to each other,
in public or in private, and to pray
for each other; to enjoin
what is pleasing to G!D; and to
forbid what is wrong, or detestable
to G!D who loves justice
and detests wickedness
(surely o, you realise, perhaps,
for I surely realise how heinous
my acts were in the sight of
the All-knowing
All-hearing
and All-seeing One
and yet He pardoned me!
O, thank u thank u thank u thank u
thank You, O Compassionate
and Most Merciful One,
Lord of lords,
King of kings,
to whom all will come to worship,
for Your righteous acts are revealed
And who will not fear You?
For You are the only holy one:
You who was
You who is,
the Everlasting G!D
who does awe-inspiring
(awe-some)
deeds in just and true ways
Ah- confessions, confessions.
Have I visited sex workers,
or so-called street-walkers? Yes.
Paid money to have their company?
Yes.
Have I stolen what I have stolen? Yes.
Have I delighted in my biases,
(as socially conditioned as they may be,
for that is no excuse) against people
who look different from me:
have I delighted in calling them
names, being nasty to them generally,
(oh, not intending to play a victim
of circumstances. I knew what I was doing,
social conditioning or not. I wanted
to have- delight- or, it seemed
at that time,
doing (oh, how horrible, in
hindsight, how horrible a thing
to do to others, (oh) yes, for Man
is said to be made in the likeness of G!D)
now, thinking "I am horrible person"
"a monster"
now, a visit to a professional counsellor some
time ago, she asked me when I said
'I am such a horrible person"
she asked me
"why would you say that?"
Oh, it was simply
the best I could do at that time
I wanted to fit in
People around me
they were cool, to me, at least
and I wanted to do everything
that they did,
(imitation is the sincerest form
of flattery, ainnit, but that beside the point)
and well, turns out
I found a way to imitate them
and that happened at a restaurant ('fast
food', might be familiar to you; not gonna
advertise, of course, so no identifying name
of restaurant)
ya, I called them what-ever those whom I deemed 'cool'
at that time called them. Well, it is the name of their
race spelt backwards. They- ah- ha-ha-ha (laughing)
funny
how things turn out
'we of the Spirit of G!D do things that seem
foolish in the eyes of the world, and those who
are of the world' so it says in Scripture.
Well, wha- why am I laughing? To explain,
I don't care whether you laugh or not, it's still
funny to think about it - they- 'cool' people
thought they were foolish. So I had the audacity
to say whatever I wanted to them- those who were
perceived to be "foolish". Now I find myself
on the receiving end of being called "foolish"
(hah-hah-hah_
almost crying, tears coming to eyes (it's so funny)
not to say I don't wanna be called foolish now.
I do not mind (being called foolish, that is).
An honour, it is becoming, to be called foolish.
Yes, a great fool (big fool) I am.
ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha
if you're interested, G!D gave me guidance
to not lose sense of humour, or brought me
to a person who left a message that said to 'learn
from nature; do not lose sense of humor ever; and
the image is of the mushroom that although
soft and fragile, breaks through concrete that is hard
and tough and rough to rub against or touch. Perseverance,
maybe, to put it in a word, or in two words,
patient endurance. One word: persistence: N' another word:
longsuffering. 'All of which you know I have gone
through,' Paul writes in letter about his persecutions
and ill-treatments. Yes, and you know through
pe- poetry- web-site, persecutions and seemingly
unfair or ill-treatment that I have endured.
Why? We of the Spirit of G!D walk in each
others' shoes along the same path. Gladly I boast
about all these; to build you up, this is for; for through
the Christ, for whose sake I boast happily and joyously,
as much as this makes me a fool - you- you have made
me to be like a fool, boasting like this - oh, I ought
to be receiving commendations from many
of you, even though
I am nothing at all, and do not count myself
among "ubermensch' or the most eminent apostles
or so-called 'super-men' or 'incredibles' or 'proletariat'
or 'pop stars', what-have-you. For I am strong
when I am weak. Delighting in weakness gladly
for the sake of the Christ, whom I am not above,
gladly boasting about thorn in flesh.
Voice in head that says 'You're lousy'
'what you're writing is boring'
(ha-ha-ha-ha)
lovely voices, they are.
'your voice is sweet; and your form is lovely' (from Scriptures,
if you're wondering)
Thank You, Papa, who is Heaven, and unseen
before men, for saving my soul, even though
I am little one and worm
(bawling like baby)
thank You (feeling as if patted or hugged)
Pheng Heong TAN